Aouboom/Tanfang (Short stories)

Loving you costs too much (Angst/ Tanfang)

He keeps staring at his mobile, his hands on his chin, feet impatiently tapping on the floor waiting for his lover's response. He was online just a minute ago and now he is gone? When did he become like this? Is something wrong?

Tan questions himself as he blankly looks at the screen, his conversation with Fang was very vague. He is away on a business trip where the time difference is an hour and half. The project will take 2-3 months to get over and Tan being the patient boyfriend he is, supports Fang in every way he can and assures him that they will remain the same.

"Teerak, we are only distant by distance, not our feelings. I still love you the same if you are beside me or far in another galaxy" sounds superficial but it's the truth. Tan has too much love for Fang, too much patience and too much tolerance towards a lot of things.

He is possessive, jealous? Very much but he knows where the boundary lies plus he trusts Khaofang with his whole heart in everything and anything ever. He has always presented himself in the best way for Fang to rely on him, emotionally and physically always present for him. Their bond has become stronger than before each passing day and he is potentially planning to propose to him once his project is over.

But maybe the universe has different plans for them. Ever since Fang moved to another country for his project they have maintained a schedule to video call each other every night before sleeping, talking about their day and exchanging chains of laughter along. Everything is great, the only difference is physical touch- it's okay, it is not that important right?-

Fang also made sure to tell everyone about their relationship, they welcomed him with open arms and warmth. Everything was going smoothly until one time he uttered another guy's name

"I made a friend Tan, he is like your lost twin brother" someone similar to him? Who could it be? That statement did make him feel uncomfortable, his chest feels heavy as Fang tells him about his day with the friend he just made and each word was sharp as a needle to him. It was hard not to snap at him but it is his lover. Watching him through the small screen being very enthusiastic and energetic while speaking of someone who is not him is making his blood boil.

He even manages to describe the guy perfectly in one breath. Good looking and smart, he helped Fang around the office as he was struggling to understand the functions of printers due to lack of linguistics knowledge.

There is this uncomfortable knot in his stomach which is tightening, making him nauseous. He wants to yell at him to stop him from uttering anyone's name, forget about everything he has just heard.

"Uhm Teerak, Peem is calling me.I will text you later. Bye bye, JubJub" without giving Fang anytime to respond he quickly hung up sighing with his head in his hands. Soon hot tears started to swell up in his eyes, dripping softly and rushed followed by his sniffs. It hurts to see his boyfriend talk about someone else who is not him or someone from the gang.

This must be his insecurities acting up again, he never confronted Fang about any. He is not perfect or does not care about his feelings. He tried his best to be the great boyfriend anyone - Fang - could ever ask for. He becomes his strength and shields him through every danger.

He is afraid that Fang might find him uncomfortable, he only knows the side he had shown to him. Tan was uneasy with a lot of things in the past as well, all the girls Fang had dated he can't stand them. That day when he got to know that Fai is one of them he had the urge to say something over it, something that would've led to a conflict.

He loves Fang too much, too much that he is affected by everything and anything, they can be easily solved because Fang doesn't need to do much, he can just say sorry or lovingly whisper some sweetness in his ears and that would solve everything but that's not the case anymore.