Alternate Battle for Dream Island

ABFDIA 18b: Unfriendly

Life goes on, unfortunately.

Though the circumstances may change, the subtle details from day to day changing and varying, stopping you from being able to just relax and go through the routine motions, at the end of the day life eventually returns to the status quo, the baseline. It may not be one you like, a standard that you detest and loathe, but that's what the universe has decided upon with little to no concern about what *anyone* thinks about it.

Things have changed. Firey and the others could once again see the sun, feel its warm light on their skin, touch grass, breathe fresh air, and so on, and so forth. They were in a brand new location, one which was just as foreign (if not more so) than the miserable cave they were previously in, with their next adventure most likely just around the corner. That's what they wanted, wasn't it? That's what they've been *begging* for all this time. Especially Flower, being the only one that actually *needed* active maintenance and sustenance. They've been spending who knows how long wandering around those cramped corridors and dark alleyways, with absolutely nothing to comfort them but themselves and their own thoughts. Which was... *stellar*. They argued, they bickered, they complained, and so on. They just *couldn't* wait for them to finally find a way out, to finally have some time and space for themselves, to get a moment to rest and recuperate before once again needing to deal with them and whatever else life decides to throw at them. They're deserving of that, right?

And now they have it. Now what?

That's just another one of life's many, *many* cruelties. Another practical joke pulled on the hapless lifeforms living on its dreary world. Really, the fact that they're alive in the first place is some sort of sick joke; the best scientists of ages past (according to Golf Ball, according to those who were forced to listen to her ramblings) spent *ages* trying their hardest to fit all the pieces of that proverbial puzzle, eventually concluding that it took a lot of random chance, a lot of flukes, and a *lot* of time to make it happen. In 99.992763% of possible scenarios, in basically all the possible routes the universe could've gone down, in an *ideal* world, they shouldn't be here right now, suffering through all of... this. And yet they are, and they're left to wonder just *why* exactly that is.

And another thing to scratched their head about is the fact that they never seem to be satisfied, they never seem to be *happy*. According to GB's constant lectures, it is the goal of every single living being to live comfortably, without having to exert any sort of painful, stressful effort. The traits of every single species and creature developed, over *countless* years of random decisions and natural selection, in order to fulfill that singular desire. Whether or not walking, talking inanimate objects fit into the evolutionary tree remains up for debate, but it didn't seem *too* far-fetched that they'd pursue much the same goals. What else were they gonna do in this miserable rock, anyway? *Not* be happy?

Hm.

It's from that evolutionary path from which those feelings emerged. Since every single action required for survival required them to expend energy, they were naturally driven towards encouraging that as much as possible. Even though exploration required *immense* amounts of effort, far more than they'd be willing to spend, *far* more than they'd burn by just lying around all day, they'd end up being driven to it regardless. All because of that all-powerful, ever-looming feeling that is boredom. The constant need for movement, for excitement, for *action*. They had to be doing something with their lives, regardless of whether or not they wanted to or not, because it was *necessary* for them to do so if they want to keep on living, if they want to spend more time idly lazing about.

Well, that's *one* theory, anyway. One of many concepts that GB and her... *associate* managed to pull out of the few remaining pages from the times before, before all this nonsense about a Battle for Dream Island, perhaps even before they all wandered randomly into these green plains. Why did she even pay so much time and attention towards these scraps of nonsense, anyway? Those that came before them seemed to have spent all that time doing things just as boring and tedious as this, and look where that got them. Frankly, none of them had *any* clue how or why that bozo-brain bossy-bot manages to get any excitement or enthusiasm out of being stuck in her depressing Factory all day, doing all this research into things that don't really matter.