My Boyfriend's Dad

An Attraction

Gabby POV:

It's been almost two weeks since we've been living together, and I'm not sure what to do with my body. My heart races so fast when I'm alone around him, and I don't know what to do with my body anymore. It feels like my attraction to him is getting stronger and worse every day, and I hate myself for that. Hector appears to be delighted with our interactions; they make a lot of fun of me, but my gaze is always drawn to him, and I know he is aware of how much he affects me. I feel disgusted with myself at times because why am I like this, why do I always grasp for things that are not mine to own.

Today I plan on doing some work for a client of mine, I accept it only to keep my mind occupied and focus on what right for once since I got here, Edward is out, I know I watch him leave this morning a short and a tight shirt barely holding his physic, my eyes roam freely at his chest not caring if he sees what I am shamelessly doing, before he walks out, I can see the sneer on his face; a part of me wants to test how much I can play the mouse and cat games, but I know deep inside that I will lose more than everyone else in here, so I am doing everything I can to chase away the thriffling feelings that keep me awake at night.

I caught myself daydreaming about what it would feel like to have this forbidden experience with him, sometimes I even use Hector to get off, I know what you're thinking, but I can't help but feel attracted by him, I just want a taste, is it that bad, judge me all you want, but when you're surrounded by such of good looking men, Is it selfish to want them both? I want Hector, but I also want his father. Is it crazy to be like this? Before, I only wanted the father, so I played with the son emotionally to get to his father, but now it's different. I still love Hector, but physically I just want his father to do things that are inappropriate to me, or maybe I just need to start touching some grass, which is what I'm doing right now.

People always say the best things in life always come at the wrong time, and right now I feel like I have the right thing, but the best thing that I am looking forward to seeing is someone that shouldn't even be entertaining, but here I am day and night daydreaming about someone that I know I shouldn't even be around with, I feel like that is my karma for all my wrong decisions, but somehow I feel like it is my destiny to be in this situation.

A part of me wants to act morally because I know better, but my sinful desires want that attention more than I should, and I'm at a loss for what to do with myself. I detest the fact that I am cheating on my boyfriend, who would sacrifice everything for someone who hardly gives a damn about me. Why do I keep chasing the ghost of my past and making the same mistakes over and over again? It's like a timeline of my failures and mistakes; why can't I do nothing right when I already know what will happen if I do it?

After I was done with what I was doing, I turn my computer off and go lay down, I could barely sleep since I got here, my dream and fear consumed me at night, making it hard for me to have a good rest, Hector has been bringing me some tea every night before bed so I could feel more rested, but all it does is tearing my heart apart, because I know why and somehow I can't even react to it, I feel like a fool, loosing sleep on someone you barely know, now I see why my ex called me a loose tramp when we broke up: I always sought things that weren't mine yet ignored the people who loved me the most.