Nie MingJue hugging him feels insane to Lan Huan, and under other circumstances, he might have enjoyed it more, but he's too nervous.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” A-Jue asks him again, his voice rumbling through his wide chest, vibrating between them.
Nie MingJue makes him feel safe.
“That's good,” A-Jue laughs softly. “But I promised Shifu I would look after you, and I meant it.”
Oh, he must have said that out loud. “I have to go and see him.”
“But do you WANT to? There's a difference.” Nie MingJue rubs his back, and it feels great.
“I wanted to go when Shufu was here. With him.” Lan Huan admits.
“And now you don't?” Nie MingJue sighs. “I won't pretend to know what that's like, but do you want me to come with you? I don't mind.”
“I'm going to be Sect Leader. I have to be brave.” It sounds weak, even to himself.
“Not yet, you're not. And you can tell me the truth. I would never think less of you for being honest about how you feel about him. I can't say I understand why he did what he did because I don't agree with his actions. But that's how I feel, and I don't mean to project that onto you.”
Lan Huan nods and forces himself to step back. They're outside the infirmary, having walked here together. All he knows is that Qingheng-Jun was brought here late afternoon yesterday because he had become unconscious.
And the chances of him going back into seclusion are as equal as him staying out here where Lan Huan can see him. Lan Huan knows this might very well be his only chance to talk to his father, and he knows too, that if he doesn't take it, he will probably regret it for the rest of his life. It is that last thought that decides it for him.
“A-Jue…can you wait here for me?”
“Of course. I will stay here until you come out.”
“Okay.”
“Don't let him bully you.”
“Alright.” That produces a small smile.
“And you, don't bully him.”
Lan Huan laughs, feeling a little lighter. “Thank you.”
“No need,” Nie MingJue replies, just as quickly.
Lan Huan turns to the doors of the infirmary and pushes through, taking a deep breath to calm himself.
This is his father, and so he can't feel so nervous, right? He's never felt this anxious even when he's had to meet with Shufu, so he's being ridiculous, isn't he?
He is going to meet Qingheng-Jun, Leader of the GusuLan Clan, a famous warrior known for killing several rare evil beings. Bringer of Justice, and if directly translated, Lord of the Blue Ginger Plant. That makes him smile, and it becomes easier to place one foot after another to walk forward.
The infirmary is a huge room with beds placed on either side. All of them are empty, so Lan Huan walks up to the Healer in charge of the premises today and asks him where Qingheng-Jun is.
The Healer shows him to another door. “Acting Sect Leader Lan Qiren said he would be more comfortable here, so we moved him. I hope that is alright?” He sounds kind.
Lan Huan nods, his throat tight as he's left alone to contemplate going past the door. As his hand touches the cold, hard wood, he realises that he had said “Fuqin” instead of using his father's title when asking for his whereabouts.