Unfortunately, I Need You

12

Jungwon had been off all day. His performance at practice was abysmal, and he knew it. Every move felt sluggish, every pass off-target. The dizziness in his head wouldn’t stop, clouding his thoughts and making him clumsy on the field. His muscles seemed to betray him, refusing to execute the simplest of plays.

It wasn’t long before Dongwon’s patience snapped.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Dongwon’s voice echoed across the field, dripping with frustration. "It’s like you’ve never played before! Are you serious right now? The match is in weeks, and you’re playing like this?"

Jungwon didn’t respond. What could he say? He knew he was a mess. He knew that Dongwon was right to be furious. But hearing those words, knowing how badly he was disappointing his coach, felt like a knife twisting in his gut.

Dongwon glared at him, barely hiding his contempt. "Don’t embarrass me, Jungwon. If you’re aiming for Korea’s national team, you’d better show you’re worth it."

Jungwon stood there, absorbing the blow, his hands tightening into fists. The disappointment, the anger—it all festered inside him, adding to the chaos already brewing in his mind. He was spiraling, and the worst part was, he didn’t know how to stop it.

That’s how he found himself at the bar hours later, downing shot after shot of vodka.

He wasn’t a drinker. In fact, he hated drinking. It always seemed like a way to drown out problems without solving them, and yet here he was, drowning. The burn of alcohol down his throat gave him something else to focus on, a pain that was external, something he could control.

With each shot, his thoughts grew more disjointed. Sana. Jiyeon. Dongwon. His father. The upcoming wedding. The failed practice. The endless expectations. It all swirled in his head until he couldn’t tell where one problem ended and the next began.

He was lost.

"You alright, buddy?" The bartender asked, his voice tinged with concern as he placed another shot in front of Jungwon.

Jungwon offered a thumbs-up, a drunken smile spreading across his face. "Perfect," He slurred, though anyone could see he was far from it. The bartender just shook his head and moved on.

Jungwon didn’t care. He had no intention of stopping. The hotel bar was empty enough, and he wasn’t ready to go home and face his father’s disapproving gaze. Staying here, getting a room for the night, seemed like the only solution. He wasn’t ready to confront the mess that his life had become.

As the elevator doors closed behind him, Jungwon leaned heavily against the mirrored wall. The reflection staring back at him looked nothing like the person he used to be.

Disheveled hair, hollow eyes, and a drunken smirk. He laughed bitterly at his own reflection. "You look like crap," He muttered, pushing himself upright as the elevator dinged.

The hallway was empty as he staggered out, but just as he reached his room, a woman passed by, her long blonde hair catching his eye. For a split second, he thought it was Jiyeon. His heart lurched painfully in his chest, a wave of longing washing over him.

He hated this.

He hated that after all this time, he still couldn’t move on. Jiyeon had been everything to him, and losing her had left a hole in his chest that nothing—not even the thought of marrying Sana—could fill.

Jungwon’s relationship with his ex-girlfriend, Jiyeon, had spanned ten long years—practically his entire young adulthood. They met during elementary school, bonding over their shared passion for football and their dreams for the future. Jiyeon was his first love, and they supported each other through the stressful years of school, exams, and college applications.