From Aliya to Hafiz

Fifty-three.

Aliya.

One month.

It has been a month since I left Jersey City and I haven't spoken to Hafiz since then. The first two weeks were brutal, I woke up from nightmares and reached for him only to touch empty space, and that made me break down more than the dreams themselves did. When Jasra came a week ago, she brought with her heartbreaking news.

"It's not convenient for Hafiz and Uncle to come, so Uncle asked me to give this to you guys," Jasra said when she took the documents out of her luggage, looking hesitant.

I didn't understand why she was so jumpy until I read through it, and I felt completely sick to my stomach. It detailed Hafiz's childhood to the point of cruelty, not skimping on details and even had some pictures attached.

There was one where he looked not less than ten, curled in a corner with his head buried between his legs. His clothes were oversized and worn out but the little patches of skin revealed were painted purple and blue with bruises.

Five years of downing.

Two years of prolonged exposure to electromagnetic frequencies, sounds that caused great damage to memory and anxiety.

Bruises and injuries range from concussions to broken bones.

Ears infected and becoming impaired for six months. Six months of total silence where he was unable to hear a single sound.

Three years of being locked in a dark room all alone and starved, the shortest period being ten days.

And the final straw, hypnosis.

Hypnosis, of all things.

How could a small child go through something so cruel, and yet turn out so beautiful? What was the purpose of making such an innocent soul go through such torment?

It was when I heard Auntie's voice that I noticed the tears trailing down my face. I felt pained, I wanted nothing more than to get on the fastest flight to Jersey City, cut up the crazy people who did that to him, and protect him in my arms forever.

He grew up so well despite going through something so terrible.

"H-how can this happen? What did I do? How can I let him go? Was I out of my mind? Why did I let him go back then? I should have just kept him with me. Oh my god, Ya Allah. My child, my child, how can he go through something like this? I had no idea  How? How?"

Her hysterical mutterings alarmed Jasra and I and we rushed towards her, each wiping away our tears. Just as we neared her, her body slumped in a faint.

"Auntie!"

"Anty!"

The sound of the wind rattling outside snapped me out of my thoughts. I sat on the dining chair I dragged to the front of the window and stared outside intently. Although Auntie managed to shake off the depressed haze surrounding her, I knew she wasn't doing well. She fell sick intermittently and I always found her in the prayer room at night, crying in her prayers and I knew she was blaming herself.

She barely ate and kept growing thinner, worrying Mom and me. I finally couldn't help it and called Uncle, telling him about her condition. I thought he would immediately rush over but it has been almost a week now and he was a no-show.

But Ya Unais had called me earlier today and told me they were coming and should arrive around two in the afternoon. And it was currently 1:30. It wasn't like I was eager to see Hafiz or anything, I just wanted Auntie to see him so her mind would be at ease.