I feel dead inside. As I bite my hand so the sound doesn't escape from my mouth. Lifeless, limp, hurting. Noticable red marks all over my body. I want to hide, escape and leave. Blurry vision, water falling, never ending no not the tears this pain. The pulsing thumps in my head. Throbbing hand. Placing aa much pressure on my lips as I can. Aching heart, empty soul. No where to hide no where to go. Scissors in one hand pen in another. Everything is muggy. Flashes of what seem like death but to me is life. Can't breathe wheezing for what seems like air but is more like freedom. Feeling trapped like im suffocating. You would think thats what I wanted..to die of suffocation but no. I don't want to die a slow and painful death. I want to go as quickly and quietly as the breeze. So close yet so far. Its as easy as a step of a chair or an OD of pills....whats stopping me? Whats making me stay? Nothing for long.....
