Nothing Like Us (Justin Bieber Fan Fiction)

Chapter 4: Endless Depression

"Get your fat ass out of here!!" My father screamed. He pushed me against the door.

I stumbled but ran out the door way. My feet felt like they weren't moving but I was running as fast as I could to get away from him.

I just need to get away from him.

I suddenly fell onto the pavement and scraped my knee.

************

I opened my eyes and felt sweat all over my forehead and chest.

I rubbed my eyes and looked at the clock, it read 12:15. I usually don't sleep in this long.

I got out of my bed and stretched, my head was pounding. My dream really scared me, I never have dreams about my father. Just thinking about him brings back all the memories, and the endless depression.

I put on my slippers and went to the bathroom. I turned on the tap, undressed and got in.

After I got out, I put on the towel and dried my long black hair. My hair takes forever to dry, because its so long. After I got my straightener and straightened my hair. I went to my bedroom, put a black pair of high-rise shorts on, with a white and black striped V neck t- shirt. I kind of hate seeing other girls wearing V neck shirts, just because the girls at my school who wear them, wear them just to show their boobs. My breasts aren't that big, so when I wear those shirts I don't really mind seeing myself in them, because I don't look like a whore.

I quickly went downstairs, because in my bare feet the wooden floor is really cold in the morning. I went to the kitchen to grab a bowl and some Rice Krispies. I love Rice Krispies.

When I was about to dig in, I heard the door bell ring.

I answered and saw a fresh face I've never seen before.

"Package for Miranda Wells?" The dark man read the name on the box then looked at me.

"Yep that's me." I said, taking the box.

I closed the door, I honestly didn't care if I shut the door in his face. But in my eyes, we were clearly done our little exchange.

I teared the box open with some scissors I found in the kitchen drawer, and set the box on the island. I lifted the top and found what I've been waiting for. I ordered a sweater a while ago, the sweater was pale pink with some small spikes on the shoulders. The sweater was the wool light one where you can see it looks like it was made from yarn, hard to explain but I had a strange attraction to sweaters like that.

Kinda odd that the package from my father hasn't came yet.

The day seemed kinda boring, I made myself some spaghetti with all kinda of spices and meat. I think I'm not that bad of a cook. I can make some decent meals.

Soon enough my mom came home, looking tired.

"Do you think you could take the car and go to the grocery store? I'm really tired from today." My mom said, making a pot of coffee.

"Fine..." I said, grabbing the keys and the money on the counter.

I put on my black converse and went out the door. I saw my moms red Ford car. She got it a few months ago because her other car broke down.

I got in the car and turned the music on. Ed Sheerans song "Give Me Love" was on. I really love Ed Sheeran, his music just speaks the words I've been feeling.

Since I'm 17, almost 18 I have my drivers' license. I'm really glad I do but I never actually drive. It's kinda boring.

I put it in drive and left. When I got to the store, there was a lot of selection. But I had to get milk, lettuce, sour cream and tortilla chips.

I went to the chip section first and I don't believe who I saw.

Morgan.

"Thought you had more chips at home, or did you eat them all... Fatass." She said, picking out some pasta sauce.

"Fuck off." I said, flipping her the finger.

"I'm so scared." She said, giving me a scared-not-scared look.

"Bye?" I said.

"No wonder why nobody likes you, you're a skanky bitch who can't do anything right. Nobody likes you Miranda, you're a slut!" Morgan said, giving me an evil glare. With a smile.

I stood there, clueless, hurt, depressed.

I finally got back to earth, and ran. Ran out of the store, forgetting everything I had to get. I ran to the car and struggled getting it open, but when I did I sat in the car crying. It started to get cloudy out, a few minutes in the car it started pouring outside. Just the weather for how I'm feeling right now, like I want to die.

I know it's just Morgan and she's just trying to get me to break, and it worked. I'm starting to believe it.

When I got home, I ran upstairs as fast as I could, I couldn't even remember where I was going. I just knew I had to find my razor blades.

When I came into the bathroom I looked in the mirror. All wrecked, my hair was soaked from the pouring rain. My mascara was running half way down my face and some at the corner of my nose.

In the shower I found a razor. I took the razor off of the handle and didn't hesitate to do what I promised myself I wouldn't do when I'm depressed.

"Deeper" I told myself. The cut I just made deeper, was the scar I had for about 2 years. The night my mom tried to commit suicide. The cut reminded me of that night, I didn't want to think about.

I started bleeding on my leg, which didn't scare me. Since it happens often, I just got some toilet paper and wiped my leg.

"Honey! Where is the stuff?!" My mom asked, yelling from the bottom of the stairs.

"I-I- couldn't find it there." I lied. But my mom never knows when I'm depressed.

"Oh... Are you sure?" She asked. Unsure of what I said.

"Yup." I replied, holding my wrist walking into my bedroom. I slammed the door quickly and laid in my bed. I don't feel great but I feel calmer than I was 10 minutes ago. My blue comforter was starting to get blood on it. So I took the blanket off of my queen bed and just had my black sheets. I rolled over, looked at the time and it was only 6:34. But I didn't care, I just wanted to lay down forever.

I just wish I could.