Chapter 31

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Noah’s message still lingered on my phone screen as I stared at it, the silence in the room suddenly feeling suffocating.

“I know you need space, but don’t shut me out. We need to talk when you’re ready.”

I could feel the weight of his words pressing against my chest. He wasn’t wrong I had been avoiding this conversation, burying myself in my thoughts and letting the tension grow between us. But the truth was, I didn’t know how to even begin explaining how I felt.

“Everything okay?” Kennedy’s voice snapped me out of my spiral. She was sitting on the couch across the room, her laptop balanced on her knees, but her eyes were on me.

“Yeah” I said quickly, locking my phone and slipping it into my pocket.

She raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. Before she could press further, the front door swung open, and Noah stepped inside.

His eyes immediately found mine, his expression neutral but his gaze piercing.
“Hey” he said, his tone casual but tight.

“Hey” I replied, my voice quieter than I intended.

Kennedy looked between us, clearly sensing the tension, before closing her laptop. “Right. I think I left something in my room” she said, standing up and disappearing down the hallway without another word.

Noah waited until she was out of earshot before speaking again. “You didn’t reply to my message.”

I shifted uncomfortably, leaning against the armrest of the couch. “I saw it. I just… didn’t know what to say.”

“You didn’t know what to say” he repeated, his tone calm but laced with frustration. “Estella, I’ve been worried sick about you. You came home looking like—” He stopped himself, his jaw tightening as he glanced at Eden, who was now reaching for the toy box in the corner.

I crossed my arms defensively. “I didn’t mean to worry you. I just needed time to think.”

“And you didn’t think I deserved to know what was going on?” he asked, his voice rising slightly. “You went to your mom’s, then to Felis’s, and left me in the dark about all of it.”

“I wasn’t trying to leave you in the dark” I said, my own frustration bubbling up. “I just needed space to figure things out without everyone breathing down my neck.”

“I’m not ‘everyone,’ Estella” he shot back, his voice firm but not loud. “I’m your boyfriend. You don’t have to do this alone, but you keep shutting me out like I’m some stranger.”

“That’s not fair” I said, standing up. “I didn’t shut you out—I just didn’t want to dump everything on you when I barely know how to deal with it myself!”

Noah set Eden down gently in her play area, running a hand through his hair as he turned back to me. “You don’t have to have everything figured out, but you have to let me in. How am I supposed to help if you won’t talk to me?”

“Maybe I don’t want help!” I snapped, immediately regretting it when I saw the hurt flash across his face.

For a moment, the room was silent except for the sound of Eden giggling as she played with her toys.

Noah exhaled slowly, his voice softer this time. “Do you even hear yourself right now? Estella, this isn’t just about you anymore. We have a daughter who looks up to you, who needs you. I need you.”

The weight of his words hit me like a freight train, and I sank back onto the couch, my head in my hands. “I know” I whispered. “I know, and I’m sorry. I just… I didn’t know how to face you after everything with my mom. It’s like every time I try to move forward, something pulls me back, and I’m so tired of it.”

Noah sat down beside me, his presence grounding. He didn’t say anything for a moment, letting the silence stretch between us.

Finally, he spoke, his voice gentle but firm. “I get that you’re tired, Estella. But you don’t have to do this alone. I’m here. Kennedy and Austin are here. Even Felis, apparently. But we can’t help if you keep pushing us away.”

I nodded, tears stinging my eyes. “You’re right. I know you’re right. I just… I don’t want to mess this up.”

“You’re not going to mess this up” he said, reaching for my hand. “But shutting me out? That’s how things fall apart. So please, stop running and just let me in.”

I looked at him, his eyes steady and full of the love and patience I didn’t feel I deserved. “Okay” I said softly, squeezing his hand. “I’ll try.”

“That’s all I’m asking,” he said, pulling me into a hug.

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