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Chapter 5

Two days had passed since that phone call with Orion, and I still hadn’t told a soul about it. Part of me kept insisting it was just a dream, something my mind had made up to taunt me. But I knew it wasn’t. The memory of his voice felt too real, too close, to brush off that easily.

I hadn’t spoken to any of my brothers in years over five, at least.

Leo had been the last to leave, walking out like the others when he turned eighteen. I thought I would’ve felt something when he left, but by then, it was like I’d built up a callous around that part of myself.

With each brother that left, the sting grew duller, until all I felt was an empty sort of acceptance. That’s just how it went in my family.

They’d all vanished when they reached adulthood, without looking back.
And now, after all this time, I had finally heard from one of them. And no matter how much I tried to bury it, Orion’s voice kept echoing in my head, bringing questions I didn’t dare answer.

The questions nagged at me, no matter how hard I tried to push them away.

Why now? Why Orion, after all these years?

By the time Leo left, I was numb to it. There was no use asking why. The house had become a place of echoes and closed doors.

Somehow, I’d learned to live in the empty spaces they left behind. Each time one of them left, it was like another piece of family had vanished, but I got used to it. It felt like that was how it was meant to be.

But now, Orion had called me. And that single call cracked through all the walls I’d built, leaving me restless.

I kept playing his words over in my mind, the sound of his voice, as if it could tell me more than he’d actually said.

I didn’t know what he wanted, or if I even wanted to know. But the truth was that I hadn’t stopped wondering.

I was pulled out of my thoughts by a hand suddenly waving in front of my face. “Huh? What?” I asked, confused, looking up into Noah’s concerned eyes. “Kennedy asked if you wanted to order food too,” he repeated gently. “Oh, yeah, sure… What are you guys thinking of getting?” I asked, doing my best to act normal, as if I hadn’t just been lost in a thousand memories.

Kennedy and Austin, sitting across from us on the other side of the couch, exchanged a glance before looking back at me, their expressions tinged with worry. It was obvious they’d noticed something was off, but I wasn’t ready to talk about it—not yet, anyway. I forced a smile, hoping it would ease their concern, but even I could feel it didn’t quite reach my eyes.

“We were thinking pizza,” Kennedy finally said, her tone gentle, as if she was afraid of saying the wrong thing. “Sound good to you?”

“Yeah, pizza’s fine,” I replied, trying to sound casual. But as they started discussing toppings, my mind was already drifting back, back to the call with Orion, the questions left unanswered. The urge to tell someone was there, but where would I even start? And what if, in trying to explain, I only made things more complicated?

Noah nudged my shoulder lightly, snapping me back again. “You okay?” he asked, lowering his voice.

I nodded, trying to brush it off. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just… tired, I guess.”

He gave me a look that said he didn’t quite believe me, but he didn’t push further. Instead, he just patted my shoulder before turning back to join the others in the conversation. But as I sat there, surrounded by the warmth of my friends, I realized just how alone I felt with the weight of Orion’s call hanging over me.

As the conversation drifted back to toppings and delivery times, I tried to shake off the weight pressing on my chest. I should have felt comforted here, surrounded by people who actually cared about me, but instead, I felt like I was hovering on the edge of two worlds the one with my friends and the one with my brothers, each pulling me in a different direction.

"Extra cheese, right?” Austin asked, pulling me back once again. I nodded, forcing another smile, though the thought of eating anything made my stomach twist. I could tell they were trying to keep things light, sensing that I wasn’t quite myself, but no one brought it up. For a moment, I was grateful.
I wasn’t sure I’d even know how to explain what was going on.

As they settled on the order, Noah leaned a bit closer. “You know you can talk to us, right? About whatever’s on your mind,” he said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper.

My first instinct was to brush it off, to keep the walls up, but something in his gaze made me pause. I took a deep breath, feeling the urge to just say it, to let someone else carry a piece of this. “It’s… it’s my brother Orion” I said finally, my voice so soft I wasn’t sure he’d heard me.

Noah’s eyebrows lifted slightly, but he didn’t interrupt. “I hadn’t heard from him in years,” I continued, my fingers picking at the edge of a cushion as I spoke. “And then, out of nowhere… he called two days ago. Just like that. It’s been messing with my head.”

Kennedy and Austin, who had been busy talking about delivery times, both turned toward me, their expressions softening.

“What did he say?” Kennedy asked gently.

“Not much. Just enough to make me wonder why he bothered calling at all,” I admitted. I hadn’t realized how much that question had been gnawing at me until I said it out loud.

Why had Orion reached out now, after all this time? And why did it feel like he’d dragged every unresolved memory back to the surface?

Austin placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder. “Look, whatever it is, we’re here for you. If you need space, we’ll give it. But if you need someone to listen, we’re not going anywhere.”

Their support eased something in me, even if it didn’t answer the questions that Orion’s call had left. For the first time since that call, I didn’t feel completely alone in it. And maybe, just maybe, that was enough for now.