Back to Us

Chapter 39

POV Leo

The smell of sizzling bacon filled the air, and I could feel my stomach rumble as I glanced at the kitchen. Nash was flipping pancakes like a pro while Atlas sat at the table, eyes glued to his phone. I should have been focused on breakfast, but all I could think about was Austin.

Austin. The best friend of my little sister, Estella. It didn’t matter how many times I told myself that there was no way I should be thinking about him this way. He was four years younger than me, and he was Estella’s best friend. It felt wrong to even entertain the thought. But there was something there. Something that made me want to sit next to him during movie nights, laugh at his jokes, maybe even—no, stop, I thought to myself.

“You’re staring at that coffee like it owes you money” Nash said, breaking me out of my thoughts.

I glanced up at him, trying to act casual. “I’m just tired” I muttered, giving my usual half-hearted response.

“Uh-huh” Nash said, flipping another pancake. “You’ve been off all morning. Something on your mind?”

I hesitated for a moment, wondering if I should say something. Could I tell them about Austin? About how it felt weird but also right at the same time? Maybe if I just said it out loud, it would help me understand what was going on in my head. But I couldn't—this was Austin, my little sister’s best friend. It didn’t matter how good-looking or funny or easy to talk to he was.

I cleared my throat, deciding to test the waters. “You ever think about how weird it is when someone in your life becomes... something more?”

Nash raised an eyebrow and stopped mid-flip. “Like, ‘I’ve been secretly in love with you all along’ more? Or like, ‘I want to start dating you’ more?”

“Uh, more like the second one” I muttered, trying to keep it light, but the words felt heavier than I intended.

Atlas finally looked up from his phone. “Wait a minute—are we talking about Austin?”

I groaned inwardly. “Shut up, Atlas.”

Nash laughed and leaned against the counter, still flipping pancakes with an exaggerated flourish. “Wait a minute—Austin? Our little sister's best friend?”

“Exactly” I said, rubbing a hand over my face. “It’s like... everything about it feels wrong.”

“But you’ve got feelings for him?” Nash pressed, a teasing smirk on his face.

I nodded, glancing over at Atlas who was now watching me intently, probably waiting for me to explain how I got myself into this mess. "It’s not that simple. I mean, he's four years younger than me. And he's Estella’s best friend. That makes it... awkward, right? It's like crossing a line that shouldn't be crossed.”

“Okay, but do you think Estella would mind?” Atlas asked, sounding unusually thoughtful.

“I don’t even know" I muttered, chewing on my bottom lip. “It’s just, it feels weird. I don’t know if it’s even something I should act on."

Nash set the spatula down and turned toward me. “So, you’ve got a thing for him, but you’re not sure how Estella would feel about it? It sounds like you’re overthinking it."

“Right?” I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "I mean, it feels like one of those situations where if it goes wrong, everything’s messed up. I don’t want to hurt Estella or mess up their friendship, but also... I don’t want to ignore how I feel either."

Atlas leaned back in his chair, his eyes narrowing slightly as he analyzed me. “It’s not like you’re talking about some random person.  Maybe it won’t be as awkward as you think.”

"But he's Estella's best friend" I repeated, my voice almost pleading. “And I’m the older brother. It just... feels weird.”

"Yeah, but maybe it’s not that weird. I mean, people date friends of family all the time" Nash said, shrugging. "If you think there’s something there, you should probably explore it. But also, don’t rush into it just because you feel some type of way."

I thought about it for a moment. What did I really want? Did I want to act on it? Or was I just letting the confusion of the situation stop me from seeing the possibility?

Nash clapped me on the back, bringing me back to reality. “Listen, Leo, we’re your brothers. We’ve got your back, whatever you decide. But don’t stress over it too much. If it feels right, it probably is.”

“Thanks, Nash” I said quietly, feeling the weight of his words settle in. “It just... feels complicated.”

“It always does” Atlas said, his gaze drifting back to his phone. “The question is whether you’re willing to make it less complicated.”

I took a deep breath, letting their advice settle in. Maybe I was overthinking it, and maybe I should just take it one step at a time. If it turned out to be something, then I’d figure it out. If not, then at least I wouldn’t be left wondering what if.

As the conversation shifted, I caught myself thinking about Austin again. And this time, I didn’t immediately try to push the thought away. Maybe, just maybe, it was worth exploring.