Sister Mother

Chapter 30

Addie's secret Leo notebook

May 9th

Lee,

Thanks for being the one constant in my world. Everything else keeps changing, but you're my anchor. You ground me and make me feel like the Addie I've always been. Things are going to get worse, but I hope you know that I still miss you. I might not text a lot, but I'll still miss you. Please keep being my anchor.

-Adds

⫷👁⫸

Addie

We let the victory of the court case sink in for two weeks. Uncle Jason called us several times a day, but avoided coming to our house. Neither Gabe nor Beatrice knew why he was refusing to visit. Kevin came over every day.

Fifteen days after the court case, Uncle Jason knocked on our door. He walked into our house with slow and heavy footsteps with Kevin following. The five of us all sat on the couch. Beatrice cuddled with The Damn Cat as tears streaked down her face. I don't remember Uncle Jason coming out and said the words that I'd been waiting for him to say for the past thirteen months. I vaguely remember skimming through my calendar, calling Jesse and asking to change my shift while Kevin cancelled some of his lab hours.

Friday, we all decided. It didn't interfere with any of our work or class schedules, and Beatrice had spring break the week after, so she wouldn't have to go back to school right away.

I'll forever hate Fridays.

Leo

I told myself I wasn't going to blow up Addie or Beatrice's phone today. They both told me that their parents were being taken off life support. Last night I told both of them to let me know if they needed anything. I texted Addie again this morning and told her I was thinking of her.

I didn't know what else to say.

Addie

Gabe, Beatrice, Kevin, Uncle Jason and I all sat in Mom and Dad's ICU room while two nurses turned off the machines and withdrew the tubes and wires. Mom and Dad's hearts were beating the same way a car in neutral still rolled down a hill without someone driving it. Watching them was like watching a quiet dance. A silent, orchestrated and tragic dance. None of the five members in the audience had a dry eye.

"Should we say something?" Kevin asked.

"Haven't we said our goodbyes already?" I asked.

"We should each say goodbye again," Uncle Jason said. "Even if we think we're ready for this, none of us are."

Gabe walked between the two twin beds. He put his arm over Mom's chest and choked up a sob. "I don't know if you guys can hear me. I thought I'd be ready for this, but—" He shook his head and looked at Dad. "We'll be alright. Maybe not right away, but eventually. I love you guys." He whispered something to Mom and walked over to Dad. Gabe put his hand on Dad's shoulder, whispered something and then turned around. "I need a few minutes. Come get me if it's time." He exited the room.

"Bea?" I asked.

She shook her head, leaning against my shoulder.

"I'll go," Kevin said, walking between the beds. He was quiet for a long time as he stared down at my parents. He rocked his entire body weight from side to side. He sat on the edge of Dad's bed. "Tell my mom I said hi, please."

Beatrice sniffled as tears leaked down her cheeks. Kevin left the room slowly.

"Go say goodbye, Bea," I whispered. "Uncle Jason's right, none of us are ready for this."