king for a day ¹ ━━━━ jacaerys velaryon fanfic

44

- ̥۪͙۪˚┊❛ CHAPTER FORTY FOUR ❜┊˚ ̥۪͙۪◌
GOODBYE, MY DANISH SWEETHEART
❛ and i don't blame you
if you want to
bury me in your memory
i'm not the girl i ought to be ❜

౨ৎ disclaimer
unedited , I'M ALIVE

EUDORA.

Alicent combed through Eudora's hair, something she would've done to Helaena otherwise.

The girl kept her face blank as the dowager queen began to slowly braid through her strands, twisting and knotting to get it right. Eudora has protested for Alicent to do so, but she insisted. So in silence the Stark sat, waiting for the older woman to finish. "I didn't want this," Alicent mumbled, her fingers twisting the girl's hair into an updo. "Not this way, yet the gods decided to betray me–"

"They didn't betray you, they gave you what you wanted," Eudora bit back, her expression still the same. "You asked for this."

"I didn't ask for any of it, I merely followed what was laid out for me."

She watched as the Stark shook her head, moving away from her touch. Alicent's hand froze as she did, the braid she had carefully been working on unraveled, a few loose strands falling over the girl's shoulders. The queen's lips pressed together, her fingers tightening into a fist. "You believe that, do you?" she asked. "That I wanted this war? That I wanted to see Aemond sharpen his sword to see you off to your death?"

Eudora's gaze turned to the floor. "You wanted me to marry him, as if I was just some lamb to slaughter."

"That's not fair, Eudora," Alicent's jaw tightened. "I wanted– I wanted you to be happy, you were a daughter to me."

This caused her to laugh bitterly. "Do you know what Aemond is taking from me now that I'm here? What your family has cost me?"

"I tried to protect you," Alicent tried to reason. "The gods know I tried–"

"Yeah, and what has your gods done but put me through hell–"

"The world isn't kind to women like us, Eudora," Alicent interrupted. "We are tools, pawns in a game played by the men here. We survive by bending, not breaking. I did what I had to do, for you, for my children, for the realm."

The Stark's eyes narrowed. "And look where that's gotten you," she said, her voice cold. "A realm divided, a son soon to be dead, the other burning cities, a daughter that fled your grasps. I'd rather die then spend an eternity rotting here–"

She felt her cheek sting, her eyes darting towards the ground. Alicent's hand came instincitvelty, her hand trembling in the air where it had struck. Eudora could only take a step back, the feeling lingered across her skin. For a long, breathless moment, neither of them moved.

The dowager queen's face paled, her stare filled with horror as if she couldn't believe her own hand had betrayed her. "Eudora," she breathed, reaching towards the girl, guilt beginning to weigh her down. "I– I didn't mean–"

"Just don't," Eudora said, her voice shaky as she swatted Alicent's hand away. The Hghtower's mouth opened, then closed again. She looked like she wanted to apologize, to pull the girl into her arms and beg for some kind of forgiveness. But she was never given that bond, that privilege to. And the look on Eudora's face told her all she needed to know.

"Please," Alicent whispered, her voice pleading. "Eudora I–"

She watched as Eudora raised a trembling hand to her cheek, the sting of Alicent's slap still lingering, but that wasn't what cut her so deep. It was the mere fact that she's tried her hardest to see Alicent as something more– someone better. Someone who could've been a guiding light in all the commotion in the Red Keep.

Eudora wanted to believe in her.

And yet every time the young girl thought there might be something redeemable in the queen, she was reminded that the woman standing before her was just as cold hearted as the men that destroyed them. Eudora's throat tightened as she drew in a shaky breath, her eyes flickering to Alicent. "I tried," Eudora told her.

Alicent stilled. "What?"

"I tried to see you as someone more than this," her gaze finally meeting Alicent's eyes. "More than whatever they made you out to be. More than their queen. I was always told that I came here so you could protect me– that you'd actually care–"

"I do care, I've always cared," Alicent told her desperately, stepping forward as though closing the distance would undo the harm.

Eudora could only shake her head. "You only care for what I can do for you– about what my existence means for your position," she said, her voice growing colder with each word. "You needed me to keep Aemond in line, you needed my family to bear your banners, to tie my house to your cause."

"That's not true," Alicent protested, her eyes beginning to pool with tears. "You were different. You were–"

"I was what, Alicent?" Eudora snapped, her head tilting slightly. "A daughter to you?" This silenced the older woman, who tried to come up with things to say. But the Stark was faster with her words. "You're not strong, Your Grace. You're a coward who hides behind your new gods and duty to justify the lives you've ruined. I hope the Seven are proud of you."

Alicent sumbled back a step as if the words had physically hit her. "Eudora, I'm begging you–"

"Don't you dare start," Eudora told her with a sigh. The braid Alicent tried to do on her was still half finished, loose strands falling over her shoulders, but she didn't care. "You've had years to show me some kind of kindness or grace– years as my ward, as someone who should've been like a mother to me but here you are, pretending to be one now. You failed."

The words hung in the air, thick and oh so suffocating. Alicent collapsed onto the ground, her hands clutching the edge of Eudora's dress. "I'm sorry," she whispered over and over again. "I'm so, so sorry." But when she looked up, Eudora only stared at her– the Stark's eyes cold and unreadable.

One quick tug set Eudora free, leaving the girl to walk out of her chambers, the sound of Alicent's muffled sobs following her down the hall.

(( 🫗 ))