What It Cost

Final Edit

The days leading up to the tour passed in a blur of preparation and subtle tension. Lilly threw herself into editing photos, organizing schedules, and quietly learning the intricate dynamics of living with the band. Her budding friendships with Ruffilo, Folio, and Jolly brought moments of ease. Ruffilo's easygoing nature made it easy to connect. He'd often invite her to watch anime, play video games, or distract her with funny stories from their touring days. Folio's more humorous demeanor offered a comfortable partnership, and their time together felt natural. Jolly offered a quiet solace. Lilly often found themselves working next to each other. Her on her photos and Jolly on his music.

Noah, however, occupied a more complicated space in Lilly's mind. Their interactions were marked by an awkward intimacy, particularly in the mornings and evenings as they navigated having to share a bathroom. Noah had begun to notice the small details: the way she struggled to find her glasses at night, the care she took with her skincare, and the faint tremor in her hands when she skipped too many meals. Once quick and efficient, his own routine stretched longer as he found excuses to linger, to help her find her misplaced contact case, or to simply talk.

In those quiet moments, their conversations deepened. Noah would ask thoughtful questions about her work, her past, and her plans for the tour. Lilly, in turn, would share pieces of her past, though always with a subtle wall up. The connection between them grew, even if neither dared to acknowledge it outright.

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Two days before departure, Lilly had nearly completed editing the photos from the band's shoot. She called everyone to the living room, her laptop plugged into the TV, and balanced precariously on her knees as she prepared to showcase the results.

The band gathered around, their casual banter fading as Lilly clicked through the photos. Silence filled the room as the images appeared on the screen: gritty, dynamic shots that captured their energy and charisma. Lilly explained how some of the photos could be used for promotional purposes and teasers to build excitement for the tour.

Jolly, Ruffilo, and Folio quickly expressed their approval, their voices overlapping with compliments. Lilly smiled, grateful for their encouragement, but her attention lingered on Noah. Though she tried to hide it, she needed his opinion.

Noah remained silent, his arms crossed as he studied the photos. Lilly's chest tightened. The weight of her insecurities pressed down on her, mixed with the nagging voice in her mind that whispered she wasn't good enough. Wrapping her arms around herself, she braced for criticism.

Finally, Noah spoke. "These are incredible. Have you thought about other shoots during the tour?"

The breath Lilly hadn't realized she was holding escaped in a heavy sigh. "I have. I've been looking into locations in some of the cities we're visiting." Her voice wavered, but the tension in her shoulders eased.

As the meeting ended and the others dispersed, Noah lingered. Lilly unplugged her laptop and began to pack it away, acutely aware of his gaze. Finally, she turned to him and said, "You don't have to watch me..."

He shrugged, a faint smirk tugging at his lips. "I'm just thinking."

Lilly rolled her eyes, breaking the tension with a quiet laugh. "Well, I need to finish packing for the tour." She quickly left the room, retreating to her own space.

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Lilly stared at the scattered mess on her bed, frustration bubbling to the surface. After a few failed attempts to organize, she gave up and sighed heavily. Reluctantly, she knocked on Noah's door.

When he opened it, she avoided his eyes. "I... I don't know what to bring. Can you help?"

Noah raised an eyebrow but didn't hesitate. "Sure." He followed her to her room, where they began sorting through her things.

As they worked, Noah offered practical advice, drawing on years of touring experience. Lilly found herself relaxing and even enjoying the process. Their conversation drifted naturally until Noah brought up the thrift shop incident. "What happened that day? With the dress?"

Lilly hesitated, her hands pausing over a folded sweater. She debated brushing off the question but decided against it. If she wanted to build trust, she needed to open up.

"My mom," she began, her voice barely above a whisper. "She's...always been critical. Nothing I do is ever good enough. She'd compare me to everyone else and make fun of how I looked. That... voice, I think, is always in my head." She swallowed hard, her fingers gripping the edge of the bed. "I feel like she resents me for my dad passing away when I was young... I don't really talk about it." She gave a nonchalant shrug to ease the tension of her words.

Noah was silent for a moment, his expression unreadable. Finally, he spoke, his voice low and careful. "I'm sorry, Lilly. No one should have to go through that. But... you don't have to handle it all alone."

She glanced at him, her walls faltering just enough for their gazes to meet. The weight of the moment hung between them, thick and charged.

Lilly broke the silence, forcing a small smile. "I think I'm packed now. Thanks for the help." She zipper her suitcase shut and stood up, Noah following suit.

Noah nodded but didn't leave right away. His gaze lingered on her, soft yet searching, as though he wanted to say more.

"Get some rest tomorrow," he said, his voice quieter now, almost hesitant. "Things are going to get crazy once the tour starts."

Lilly looked up, meeting his eyes. For a moment, they stood in silence, the air between them filled with unspoken words. Noah reached out, brushing a stray strand of hair from her face, his fingers barely grazing her skin. The touch was fleeting but sent a jolt through her, leaving her breathless.

"You're going to do great out there," he added, his tone filled with quiet conviction. "I can already tell."

Lilly swallowed hard, a warmth blooming in her chest. "Thanks," she whispered, her voice wavering. "That... means a lot."

Noah's lips quirked in the faintest of smiles before he stepped back, his hand dropping to his side. He glanced back at her, his expression unreadable, before stepping out and softly shutting her door.

As he turned and walked away, she stood frozen in place, her fingers brushing her cheek where his touch lingered. For the first time, the thought crossed her mind that maybe, just maybe, Noah wasn't as distant as he seemed. She slowly sat on the edge of her bed, her eyes drawn to her packed suitcase.

His words echoed in her mind, filling the quiet room.