My Angel (Frerard)

5: Because Honestly, I Couldn't Be Happier

You know what sucks? Frank is bisexual, not gay. You wanna know why that sucks? Because he is dating this new bitch at school named Jamia. You wanna know why that sucks? Because I'm not her.

Frank hadn't made a move or anything on me or even said that he liked me after the bathroom incident. I thought he would, but no. Jamia just had to walk into school the next day. And Frank just had to fall head over heels for her. And here it is, just a few days before Frank's birthday. Frank thinks of Jamia as his birthday present. But you see, I wanted to be his birthday present. Stupid, right? Well, you see, I thought Frank really liked me in that kind of way. But no. Nothing good ever happens to me.

In other news, Brendon, Ryan and I hang out like, all the time. When I'm not with them, I'm at school, or with Mikey and Pete and now Patrick, who for some reason started hanging out more with Mikey and Pete. Which also, Ryan, Pete and Mikey also changed schools from my old one to this hellhole. Why? I have no fucking idea. Probably girls.

Oh shit, I forgot all of them are gay. And not single.

Anyway, when I'm not with them, I'm with Ray. Bob doesn't like me too much, I think. He hardly talks to me. Ray said he's just shy or something like that. But I believe he hates me.

I never hang out with Frank anymore unless we're at school.

He's constantly yapping about Jamia. He's all like,

'Oh, Jamia's so amazing. Jamia is the best person in the world. Jamia has the best taste in music. Jamia is the best kisser I know. Jamia this, jamia that.'

I already fucking hate this bitch and I've only said 'hi' to her once. I started hating her as soon as she walked into school and was making Frank stare. I starting having murderous thoughts about her when she batted her eyelids at him. I fucking considered actually killing her when she asked Frank out. I considered stabbing myself to death at school when he said yes. She became my mortal enemy and I thought about bitchslapping her and putting poison in her food when Frank said he liked her. She's my mortal enemy and she doesn't even know.

I hate Jamia Nestor.

First BJ now Jamia. Frank will never fucking love me. I will never have him to actually call 'mine'. He's my angel.

But not mine.

Speaking of a birthday present for Frank, I finally decided on what to get him. I found a pair of skeleton gloves with the holes for the fingers cut off, and a glow in the dark Misfits tee. I know he'll love it. I know things.

"So, when's your birthday, Gerard?" Frank randomly asked me while we were eating lunch at school. I never tell anyone. It's better that no one knows. "You never told me. I wanna know."

"It's better if you don't," I sighed. "I never tell anyone because I don't like when everyone makes a big deal out of it. I don't like being the center of attention. My family celebrates it because they know when it is. I wish I could erase that date from their minds."

"Oh, but surely you can tell me because I'm special," Frank giggled mischievously. "And because, well, you know, you've got like, the biggest crush on me, like, ever." He added jokingly.

I still blushed a deep shade of crimson.

"N-no, I don't," I breathed, rolling my eyes exasperatedly, still blushing furiously. "I don't have a crush on you, Frank." And I wasn't lying. Because I love him now. It's not a crush, it's love.

"Mmhmm," Frank giggled, obviously unconvinced. "I was just joking, Geebear. Will you please tell me when your birthday is? I wanna know because I don't wanna miss it. I wanna make it special. Because you're special. You're different. Look outside. What do you notice about the snowflakes?"