Random Quotes With Maria

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Here I thought since some of you liked my previous post regarding Maria, I thought I'd entertain you with some quotes I made up if Maria was perhaps a character within Hazbin Hotel! Enjoy!

When asked about her Hair

Maria: Huh, oh yeah, my hair used to be a bit brighter, but I dyed it so I wouldn't look old or pruney like Lute. *Whispers* I heard she's developing crow's feet.

During Meetings

Maria: *Checking her phone and mascara while Lute and Adam plot the extermination* Wait, what was it we're doing again, I was busy fixing an eyelash.

Lute and Adam: *Facepalm*

During Extermination Day

Adam: Now let's go down there and—*Notices something missing* Wait, Lute, how many exorcists do we have in our army again?

Lute: Around twenty six soldiers, including us, sir

Adam: And how many are there right now?

Lute: Uh... *Does a bit of counting* One, two, three, yada yada...Twenty five, sir

Adam: Where the f*ck is Maria?!

*With Maria*

Maria: *At the counter* I'll have a vanilla and lemon meringue Frappuccino, more frappe than cino, with two squirts vanilla, a few drops of lemon, and be sure to spell my name correctly on the cup, they sometimes mistake my name as Marina, or Marie, just put Maria. And could you add a few decorations like lemon drops or yellow sprinkles, *winks* It's my cheat day. And take your time, I'm not in any big hurry.

When Maria arrives

Maria: *Holding her Frappuccino* Hi, sorry I'm late, business was slow—*Sees the carnage on the ground caused by Niffty* Nope, nope, nope, nope,nope! *Rushes back*

During Sir Pentious's Trial when Abel corrects Lute

Abel: Um, hey, Lute. Sorry to interrupt but I think *puts on his exorcist mask* I'm actually the new head of the exorcists. *chuckles* Sorry.

Lute: What?!

Emily: Abel is Adam's son. Plus we felt he'd handle this situation more... fairly.

Maria: *Shrugs* That, and you're batsh*t crazy

Abel: *Laughs nervously* We do not...We do not say those words in front of her, Maria

St. Peter & Maria

St. Peter: See!? I told you I watched the gates, didn't I? I said—

Maria: We know, you watched the gates three times a day and with your own two eyes. I'm starting to think you have a problem

During 'Like You'

St. Peter: Christmas rom-coms all week long at the Multi-Plex

Maria: It's what we only have.

Abel: I'm in love with you Santa Claus

Maria: What?

After 'Like You' When Sir Pentious Begins Crying

Emily: Ooh...Maybe that didn't help actually

Maria: You think?

Maria & Lute (Before Performing Gravity)

Maria: Hey Lute, me and Abel are ordering fries, do you want anything?

Lute: GET OUT!!! *Throws a guitar at Maria*

Maria During the Meeting with Sera, Abel and St.Peter

Sera: What do you think we should do?

Maria: You're really asking us this right now? A gatekeeper who takes way too much pride in his job

St. Peter: Hey!

Maria: Abel, who while the Son of Adam, is still not used to being in charge, has no spine and only got the job because his dad died

Abel: *Tries to say something but then stops* She's not wrong though...

Maria: And me of all people to help you with this when this should be something the professionals should handle?

Sera: *Really? Expression*

Maria When She Views Redemption Is Possible

Maria: Oh my god...All those souls down there...all of those who died...they could be...redeemed...

Emily: Yes!! Isn't that great?!

Maria: I...I can't believe of all the hurt of those I brought...*Looks at her mirror and cries* Especially towards my own hair!!! *Begins crying*

Emily & Sir Pentious: *Stand awkwardly but still comfort Maria*

When Talking About Gift Bags

Maria: Wait, if we're doing baskets, might I suggest...*Brings bottles of lotion* Moisturizing hand lotion? I got plenty of scents~!

And that's all for now! Let me know if you're interested in more if you'd like to add more quotes to her or have her in a story too. Thank you!!!

Hazbin Hotel belongs to Vivziepop

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⏰ Last updated: Nov 20 ⏰

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