Your Ivy Grows

Chapter 54

Bucky

Bucky can't sleep; he gave up trying to an hour ago and has spent the time watching Alexis instead. The night's events have replayed over in his head, torturing him with the what ifs. What if he'd stopped her from leaving earlier? What if he'd left when he'd wanted to and gone to pick her up?

He couldn't stop watching her, couldn't drag his eyes away. There was comfort in seeing her sleeping so peacefully, nestled against him. Bucky was convinced he must have been a saint in a past life to have earned the privilege of having this woman even glance his way in this one, let alone share a bed with him. She was so far beyond beautiful that the sight of her honestly took the air clean out of his lungs.

But then his eyes focused in on one of her many injuries and that's all he could see. When she'd begged him to stay, he'd roped in his temper, keeping it tightly restrained so he could be there for her. But now it was fraying, close to snapping completely.

There weren't words to describe what he'd felt when he first caught sight of her bruised and bloodied face. He'd stupidly assumed he'd seen the worst of it until he'd undressed her and seen the true horrors John had inflicted.

His eyes seek every cut and bruise on her body. He can't bear to see them, but can't look away either. He needed to memorise them all because he'd be paying them back tenfold to the fucker who'd put them there.

Bucky would've preferred if that payback was happening at that very moment, but he couldn't bring himself to leave. He'd attempted it, once. He'd tried to slide out of Alexis's hold, but she'd let out a tiny whimper while snuggling closer to him and he'd folded like a cheap suit. All he could do was pull her body closer to his, drop a kiss to the top of her head and make a vow to himself that he'd sooner die than ever allow another person to hurt her again.

It was probably for the best that she'd trapped him in this bed. If he'd sought John out tonight, he wouldn't have let anything guide him but blind rage. His anger would've taken the wheel and the night would've ended with John dead and Bucky in handcuffs. It was what the fucker deserved, but Bucky had to be smart about it and he wouldn't have been.

He'd have shown up at his door and attacked without caring who saw him. Bucky would've pummelled John's face in and taken pleasure in the feel and sound of his bones breaking beneath his fists. Then he would've slowly choked the life from him and enjoyed every second of watching the fear in John's eyes as he snuffed out the life in him. Bucky craved it; he needed to instill the same fear in John that he had inficted on Alexis. Just the thought of that man's hands around her throat made him want to unload an entire magazine of bullets into his head.

But Alexis needed him; her little whimper had seemed pained and he couldn't leave her after that. It had given him time to plan and scheme. Bucky knew now that going after John tonight would've made him happy in the moment, but it wasn't what Alexis needed from him. She deserved the world, and he was determined to give it to her. John would get the beating he deserved, but it wasn't all Bucky would want from him.

For now, Bucky would put Alexis in her rightful spot, which was first. What she didn't need right now was Bucky getting himself arrested by being reckless in his revenge. No, what she needed was support and to be cared for while her body healed and he would make sure he gave that to her. Everything else could wait.

Bucky let out a quiet groan when he remembered how he'd caved and let her convince him to sleep with her despite her injuries. It seemed she had sussed out that he had an impossible time saying no to her. All she needed to do was ask him for something, and it was hers. The word please coming out of her mouth was like a spell, bewitching him into giving her anything she desired even when he shouldn't. He couldn't deny Alexis anything; it wasn't in his DNA.