I'm here now sa cafeteria. Matapos ng scenario ko kanina with Von e, parang nakakahiya na. So here, I decided to be alone, para lahat ng braincells ko ay mag function. Nasa gitna ako ng pagmumuni-muni nang biglang mag vibrate ang phone ko, it was a message from Kiefer. Hmmm. What's with him at bigla bigla na lang magtetext.
"From: Kiefyy;
I've heard umiyak ka daw? Nakita ka ni Von? Anong problema?"
Aw, I was touched. Kiefer is really a good buddy. I clicked the reply button
"To: Kiefyy;
Hahaha! Naaaaa, I'm okay now. I'm just stressed out. Don't worry about me. I'm okay" I replied. Tsk, ayoko talaga yung kinaawaan ako. I don't deserve it. Like yeah. Ayoko yung ganityong feeling, palagay ko kasi wala ako sa tama kong sistema. I mean, ayoko ng ganito. Hindi ako ito eh. Parang present ka nga pero mentally absent ka naman. 'Yung feeling na nganga ka. Lutang ka. This is the worst feeling ever, kaya ayoko 'yung love-love na 'yan eh. Perwisyo. Pero, mali ba ang magmahal? Kasalanan ko ba kung bakit hindi ko mapigil ang damdamin ko? Hanggang kailan ako magkakaganito? I have a choice of course, pero bakit ayaw mag sink in?!
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"Anikaaaaaaaa! Saan ka ba galing? Hindi mo ba alam kanina pa ako naghahanap sa'yo? Rinig ko kasi nasabi ni Von na nakita ka niyang umiiyak kanina. May mali ba? I mean, sa mga nasabi ko ba 'yon?! Anikaaaaa, you know naman na I don't mean it eh. I mean Anikaa--" Pinutol ko ang kung ano man ang sasabihin ni Angel. Instead I gave her a hug.
"Uhhhh, Anika. I know you love me pero..."
"Shhhhh, just let me hug you Angel. I just want to feel your warm embrace. I'm just so thankful I had you in my life as my bestest true friend!" I said.
"Awww Anika, I love you so much. Pakiss nga!" Angel said which made me smile!
"So, where have you been?" Angel asked
"I've been to London to visit the queen." I replied
"Eeheeee, Anika I want a serious and detailed answer not a sarcastic one,"
"Eh wala naman talaga, ano ka ba naman Angel?" I said
"Seryoso ka Anika? C'mon spill it up,"
I took a deep breath. Then looked at her in the eyes and said
"Hindi ko alam kung hanggang kailan ko itatago, bwisit! I mean I can't help myself, ayaw ko sa lahat yung nagseselos e. Kasi naalala ko, wala naman pala akong karapatan kasi nga kaibigan lang ako, tapos sa mga sinabi mo pa. It hit me talaga, masakit pala talaga ang katotohanan. 'Yung feeling na mahal mo yung tao pero hindi pwde kasi first, hindi ikaw ang tinitibok ng puso niya. Pangalawa, ayaw mong makasira ng relasyon kasi kaibigan mo 'yung dalawa. Ewan ko ba, pero minsan naisip ko isa na siguro akong malaking tanga. Sakit bheeeee."
Angel grasped my hand and said "Anika, you're my bestfriend, my sister, I know mahirap 'to sa'yo. Pero do you think madali sa'min na makita kang nahuhurt? Oh c'mon Anika. Matalino ka! Please 'wag kang magpakatanga, pero who am I to tell you? This is really a choice Anika, hanggang kailan mo lulunurin ang sarili mo sa kalungkutan? Hanggang kailan mo pahihirapan ang sarili mo? Marami kaming nag-aalala sa'yo kasi ayaw ka naming nasasaktan. We love you too much na makita ka lang naming umiiyak we're hurting too. Like damn you Von! Sinaktan mo si Anika! Ang manhid mo! Like that feeling of nakakaiinis!"
I for a second just looked at Angel, and with out any inhibitions I hugged her so tight! Oh jeez, ano na lang pag wala si Angel. I'm so lucky to have her as my bestfriend. Hindi ko alam kung ano na lang ako ngayon pag wala siya. Angel is a supergirl. And that's the bestest thing that she had. Alam niya kung paano ako paamuhin, paiiyakin, patatawanin at alam niya kung paano ako bigyan ng mga advices that would really help me. That's the best thing about her! And I'm proud na siya ang naging bestfriend ko!
"Angel, thank you so much! Hindi ko alam kung ano na lang ang mangyayari. Omg. You're totally the best!!! I love you Angel!!!" I said half shouting!!
"Drama natin masyado eh, c'mon let's eat! 'Yung mga alaga natin dito nagmumura na sa sobrang gutom eh?"
And as soon as I heard her said na kakain kami. Tumakbo kami sa pinaka malapit na canteen! Whoopie. This is the best!!! Lafang naaaa!!
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Hello! Thankyou so much for reading!! And for the votes! I'm so sorry if masyado siyang lame. But thank you talaga sa mga masugid na taga-subaybay!!! I love you all! To God be the Glory! :)
