Celebrity

Pride Lost

Thomas's POV

I can feel her grip on my back when we are hugging. It seemed like she really needed it today. Ava finally lets go, wiping a tear trickling down her cheek. There's an awkward silence; it's so quiet I could hear the crickets. "See you tomorrow," Ava says before she takes her leave. She moves quickly before I could say bye to her. I shut the door.

She came to apologize, but I can't help thinking that she was severely heartbroken from what's happened today. With the look in her eyes, I couldn't help but forgive her, even though I still feel hurt by her words last night. I put my hands on my face. How did I get to this point? I just wanted to get my degree in medicine, but now, since I met Ava, my life has been absolute chaos - with me getting my scholarship cancelled, then I go back to Zambia, and then she pays my fees, then I become her assistant, to being blackmailed by Bruce, amongst a whole host of things. But do I regret meeting Ava... no. But I do wish the events after could be different.

***

I'm woken up by the sunlight peeking through my window. I check my phone to see it's already mid-day, and I need to get to class. I quickly get ready; it takes me only a few minutes to take a shower and get dressed. I quickly get downstairs to find my Uber waiting outside. It's a big day; I have a big day today. I'm writing my first test, just like a normal school day, for the first time in what feels like forever.

I arrive on campus and head for class. "Thomas, hold up!" I hear a familiar voice from behind. I turn around to see Max, who's running up to me with a bunch of books in his hands, and he's barely able to carry them. "What's up? I'm late for a test," I tell him. "Chill, I'm writing one too," he replies.

I immediately feel bad for coming off like that right off the back. "I'm sorry; I've had a rough couple of days." He shakes his head. "It's cool. But what's been happening? You haven't been around lately." "I've been caught up with Ava."

"What's happened now?" Max asks, like drama always happens with Ava, does it? "The other night I was at her place, and she called me not worthy of her, so scratch your jealousy theory off the list." He looks at me with astonishment. "What?!"

Max shouts, which catches the attention of people. "And did she apologize?" "She did," I reply. "Wow, that's really kind of her." "But I wish I had held off with the whole forgiveness thing," I admit. "Why?" "I feel like I forgave her too easily."

We stop at Max's class. He puts his hand on my shoulder. "Look, the good part is that she apologized." I look at him and nod. "I guess you're right." He lets go of my shoulder and enters class. I walk over to my class, which is just a couple of feet away.

Before entering, I catch a glimpse of Emilia. We just about make eye contact before I get into the classroom. Me and Emilia haven't spoken to each other since the day I went to apologize to her at her house.

I get into the spacious room, which has six rows and a bunch of desks going in a vertical setup. I take a seat in the second row. After a few seconds, the lecturer hands out papers. After ten minutes, he tells us to begin the test.

I go through the paper before I answer. It takes me a while to realize that I didn't know practically anything that came in the paper. I guess all that running around with Ava has finally caught up with me. I lay my hands onto my face. How could I be so stupid? Of course, I'm going to fail without studying. If only I focused on my studies, I wouldn't be in this position.

I've never felt this way before in high school. I usually was top of my class, and even here, when I first arrived, I was flying. But this Ava stuff has really not helped me at all. I can't help thinking about how my family would feel knowing that I'm in this position.

An hour goes by, and I still haven't put pen to paper on any of the questions. I take a look around the room, and I see so many people really busy while I'm doing absolutely nothing. I glance at the lecturer's table in the front of the class and see everyone's phone on the table. I immediately feel my pockets to find my phone still there. The question is, should I use it? It will go against everything that I stand for, but then if I don't use it, I might fail my class. Not even might; I'll definitely fail my class. There's also another obstacle: I sit so close to the lecturer's table. But I have to take a risk. Better go big or go home. I pull out my phone and hold it under the desk. I spot the lecturer in the far end of the room to the right, so I start to use my phone in the exam.

Two hours later, the lecturer commands everyone to put their pens down. I do as told and quickly put my phone away as the lecturer receives the papers from everyone. After packing up the papers into his bag, he tells everyone to leave. I step out of the room as quickly as possible, and after I'm outside, I punch the tree. I cheated for the first time in my life. How could I ever let this happen?

I hear my phone chime. I take a look at who texted, and it's Ava. She wants me to meet her at the cafe, but I don't think I'll go because I haven't wasted so much time with her instead of focusing on my studies.

***

I stare onto the ceiling of my living room as I lie on the couch. I decided to ignore the message and didn't go. I kinda feel bad for her, especially that she apologized to me after saying some very harsh words to me. When I think about that night more, it makes me feel like my actions are justifiable.

Suddenly, I hear a knock at the door. I roll off the couch onto the floor and spring myself up to my feet. I straighten up my shirt and head for the door. I open it, and see Ava standing on the other side. "Can I come in?" she says. I let her through the door and shut it. She turns to face me. "Why didn't you come through?" "No reason," I reply.

She paces for a few seconds, then she stops. "Is it because of the stuff I said a couple of days ago? If you want, I can apologize again." "No, it's not that." "Then what is it?" She asks with a hint of desperation in her voice.

But then I remember the events of what happened earlier today. "Today, I cheated on a test," I blurt out. "That's what's wrong?" she looks at me with confusion. "What does it have to do with me?" "Everything," I say. "I've been so focused on you; I forgot why I'm here. It's not to be hanging around with you but to get my degree. I didn't want the media attention; I didn't want to be caught up with your label; I didn't want any of it."

She stares at me, her eyes meeting mine, her eyes red and watery. "Is that how you truly feel?" she says, half-sobbing. "Then I'll give you as much space as I can." Ava storms out of the house, and I'm left there alone. I never thought those things before; the words just came out. But was it fair to blame it all on Ava?