Inner Thoughts

Age is but a number

I know, I know, I'm sixteen. I shouldn't be worrying about love all that much right now.

Much like how I shouldn't drunk text the person I do love "I love you" ...at least not for another 4-5 years.

Much like how I am too young to know my sexuality.

But if I am too young to experience these things, why did I experience them?

How do I have the capability of loving someone when I am not even supposed to know the concept of love?

How did I experience heartbreak not once, not twice, but more times than I can count?

How can the majority of my thoughts be about love, about her?

About what she's doing now? Who's she with? Is ice cream still her favorite dessert? Will she ever stop loving corn beef and cabbage? Is she still single? Does she still hurt sometimes?  Does her heart pound in her chest and make her head hazy because it's going to rain the next day? Does she still think of me?

I don't think these because I'm a psychotic ex. I may be crazy but I didn't totally lose my sanity.

I think about this stuff because I care. Because I miss her and I miss being in the loop... I'm on the edge of the loop now. 

Thing is, it shouldn't matter the age.  What if we measured our life in months not years? Would I qualify then? 

Or will my 192 months not stand a chance against someone who has 312 months? 

What about weeks? Days? Hours? Minutes? Seconds? 

835 weeks vs. 1,357.

5,844 days vs. 9,496.

You get the jist. 

No matter what, I will always be below someone older than me. I will always be told I am too young for something. Even if I already went through it. Age Is used to validate actions. Or in this case, invalidate them, but you can not help what has happened. 

They can try to invalidate my love, but it won't work because even though I am only 140,253 hours old, 

I still love someone who is 157,785 old.