The Supernova Effect

Part 6: In the quiet, we begin again

"The blackbird no longer
searches for stars,
For the stars were always there,
They do not rush to burn.
They glow slowly constantly, patiently.
it finds something softer
not the brilliance of flight,
but the stillness of staying.
this is not an ending.
but a comma,
A breath, before becoming again,
In the end, we all become stories,"

Daisuke

I woke up to the smell of coffee and food.

Nova was in the kitchen, hair tied up, her sleeves pushed past her elbows. She moved like everything wasn't heavy, like the air wasn't thick with everything I've done.

I stayed quiet for a while, just watching her.
Trying to memorize the way the light hit her cheek. The tiny crinkle in her brow when she measured coffee grounds like it was science.

When she noticed me, her whole face softened.

"Hey," she said, like it was any other morning.

I nodded, my mouth too dry to answer.

She handed me a mug. The heat flowed through my palm as the steam from the coffee floated into my nose.

"I'm not sure if you have much of an appetite but I made some pancakes, sausage, and eggs, for you. I know you haven't eaten in a while." She says worriedly.

I smile softly I wasn't hungry in fact my stomach turned at the thought of food right now but I was going to eat it even if I had to force myself, because she made it for me.

"Of course I'm hungry."

She smiles with satisfaction as she sets my plate down at the table.

She leans up kissing me on the cheek. "Eat up after this we're going to an art exhibit so dress nice okay?"

I nod, "so that's your big surprise?"

"No you'll see when you get there." She winks.

Once we got done eating, Nova was Persistent on helping me shower.

"I can shower by myself, I'm not that weak." I smile.

"I know I just want to go with you.. just in case."  she says softly.

My eyes soften "okay come on." I say leading her to the bathroom.

"We need to get a new mirror." She says pointing to the shattered mirror hung over the sink and my eyes flash with the memories of my breakdown.

"We can do that later after the exhibit." I nod slowly and she smiles.

Neither of us spoke as we undressed and stepped under the water together.

Nova's eyes fluttered shut as she let the water run down her back, and for a second, I just looked at her, this girl who had every reason to run but never did.

She looked at me without a word and reached for the soap, lathering it between a washcloth before moving toward me.

"I've got it," I said softly.

She shook her head. "Let me."

Her hands slid over my shoulders, careful around the bruises. Down my arms, over my chest. Like she was washing away that night. The pills. The hospital. The guilt. She was tender with every movement, and I stood there and let her, because part of me still didn't believe I deserved it.

When she was done, I took the soap from her and did the same. Not rushed. Not greedy. Just quiet. Her skin was soft and warm, her breath catching sometimes when I moved over a sensitive spot.