Loose Ends

Two

I woke up in a bed of clouds, so soft and white I wanted to burrow myself further in to the warmth my imprint left in them and fall back to sleep. Then I noticed I was still in my underwear under the heat of sheets and blanket in a room that wasn't my hotel room. Then I remembered last night. Sebastian tied to the head board at my mercy, us walking out of the room, me still clad in my underwear and him shirtless back on the dance floor - him bringing me back to his flat. I sat up.

Ouch.

My head pounded. I didn't have anything to drink, except for the beer I had back at the pub last night, but I still felt like I was hungover. Hungover from too much fun, the type that came with too much smiling. I smiled. I did have fun last night. As I tried to battle the heavy fuzzy sensations buzzing through my head, I heard Sebastian's voice.

"You feeling okay?"

He walked in to the room wearing a deep grey button down shirt over stonewashed jeans, barefoot, carrying a crystal cup of tea on a saucer. He came and sat next to me on the edge of the bed, passing me the piping liquid.

"Here," he said gently.

"Thank you," I whispered, as I carefully took the cup from his hands and pulled it to my lips.

"Mmmm. What is this?" I asked, gratefully taking another sip.

"Lavender tea," he answered.

"I'll have to get this when I return home," I mused.

Sebastian strategically looked away. I should have known what we did last night would cause attachment, but I was too far gone to think. I looked away too, down in to my settled cup on my lap, then with a much needed distraction around the room. Smooth bleached wood flooring lead out in to a hallway. White linen covered the canopy bed paired with the white blanket and sheets matching the curtain dressings hanging from the windows. The only other furniture in the room were two bedside tables on either side of the bed and a lone accent chair set next to the window. Across the room a movie stand stretched across the wall with a large collection of DVDs. It was aesthetic and spacious with the look of an American style condo, but with English poetry. I looked out the large bay windows out on the London street below, where just beyond the ceils I could see the wrought iron window gate made for a flower bed.

No matter what the distraction, I couldn't pull my myself away from Sebastian. My heart wouldn't let me. Compassion filled me and I turned back to him. He looked up at me, his mind seemingly gone off the tense subject for the moment.

"You hungry?" he asked.

"Yeah." I smiled softly and he helped me up with an offered hand, as I slipped from the bed.

He passed me a plush ivory robe and when I slipped it on I covertly slid my nose over it, taking in his scent. We sat on the steps that lead down between his sitting room and kitchen, eating freshly baked sweet croissants, scooped melon balls, and more of Sebastian's amazing tea.

"So how did you get in to BDSM?" I asked, scooting back against the wall, so that I faced him.

He picked up a melon ball and popped it in his mouth.

"I guess I was always in to BDSM," he answered around it. "Just the idea of being tied up and at someone else's control I always found sexy.

I just listened and smiled.

"While I was interning for this design firm, one of my fellow interns always wore this necklace I noticed, so one day I asked him about it and he told me it was a collar. Having done my research I knew wanting to get in to the culture myself, but never knowing how to quite breech my nerves - I told him I would like to get in to it and he introduced me to the local community."