Luke

Chapter 28

I was being shaken. Violently.

"Fuckin stop it!" I yelled, holding my head tightly upon being woken up.

"Jesus Christ, you fucking scared me," Jay huffed, her voice shaky.

I opened my eyes, quickly shutting them and covering my face due to the light.

The blinds were shut soon after, Jay sitting down upon the bed again. "Are you okay? How do you feel?"

"Like shit," I groaned, sitting up with pain and struggle. Jay helped me get into a comfortable position. "What happened?" I asked, holding my head.

"I was hoping you would tell me."

"I don't remember jack."

She sighed. "I'm gonna grab you coffee. I'll be right back." She got up off the bed and rushed down the stairs, cabinets slamming closed and clanking of metal spoons emanating from the kitchen.

I sat up a bit straighter, groaning at the pain all through my body. I looked down to see I was shirtless, bruises littering my chest and abdomen. I smelt terrible, and when I felt my face my nose and head felt they were bruised, too.

Jay came back upstairs quickly, stirring the mug as she sat down on the floor and handed me the cup. She continued clasping onto it even when I was holding it. I think she didn't want me to drop it.

She helped me take a sip, the warm, faint vanilla flavor warming my chest.

"Jay, what happened?" I asked again, placing the mug on my lap.

"A lot of shit."

"That's very fucking helpful."

She sighed; it looked like she was trying not to snap. "Why the fuck would you do something like that, Luke?"

"What?"

"You had me worried sick. What did you take last night?"

"I...don't remember."

"Do you remember anything?"

I thought for a minute, taking another sip of coffee. "I remember coming home and feeling like shit. And drinking a lot." I paused. "I just took whatever I could find, I guess."

She shook her head in disbelief. "You promised, Luke."

"It wasn't like that."

"Sure it wasn't."

"I promised you I wouldn't try to kill myself again. Jay, you know I wouldn't."

"After last night, I don't really know what you would do anymore."

"What happened, Jay?"

She paused.

"What happened?" I asked again.

Jay looked off the side and sighed. "You called around 7:30 and asked if we could go to the drive-in. You didn't have any money and you seem wasted, so I said I would come pick you up and you could hide in the back. So I came to get you and we went to see the movie and you hid some nips in your jacket. I took them from you when you were starting your third and asked if you were alright and you said you were fine. Obviously I didn't believe you, but I let it slide. And then you started crying and I didn't really know what to do and I asked if you were okay and you started crying even more and you were just rambling on about how you hated yourself and that there was no purpose for you in the world and how you hated it here and how you just wanted to die and how you just wanted to be loved by someone and feel appreciated and cared about. And I told you that I cared about you and you didn't believe me and I didn't know what to do because I had never seen you cry before and it was so weird and I just kept trying to comfort you and-" she cut herself off. "-and then Brielle saw you with me and got really mad at you and dragged you out of the car and beat you up. I eventually sto-"