Brooke's POV
Once I hear Jake leave, the fear comes back. He's here. He's come here, for me. I thought I got away when I left school. Obviously not, it was naive of me to ever think it would be possible for him to forget about me. I can hear movement outside before Gina's soft voice. "Hey Brooke, it's just me. Can I do anything to help? Can you let me in? The guys are all in the living room. They won't come anywhere near us." I stand and hobble over to the door, opening it for her before shutting it quickly. "Brooke. We don't need to lock the door okay? I'm going to make sure you're safe. Whip's not going to let anyone come near this room unless you're dying or something." I nod slowly, leaving the door. "Okay.. That's good. Sit down now yeah? Can you speak?"
"I'm sorry.." I mutter as she strains to hear. I sit back on the floor, the bed reminds me too much of Chap.
"Can you tell me anything about what's happening? I won't tell anyone if you don't want me to." I hand her my phone so she can read the message which is imprinted on my brain. 'Bondi's a lovely place Brooke. Fancy meeting up for a swim? Luke x' "I don't understand. Do you not like him? Is he an ex or someone? Brother?" I shake my head.
"He.. he hurt me.. Before.. I was young.. He hurt me.. I.. How did he find me?"
"Brooke. I don't know how he found you, but you know the lifeguards will never, ever let anything happen to you. You have to talk about what happened. It might help it feel better, less scary. I'm guessing you've never told anyone about this before?" I shake my head, "Well I'm right here. I promise I won't judge you. I'm not going anywhere and I won't tell the guys unless you want me to and then you can tell me exactly what to say." I shake my head, trying to rid myself of the flashbacks. I have to tell someone. I can't let it build up inside anymore, and Gina is one of the closest friends I have out here.
"This will take a while.."
"We have as long as you need. Would it be easier if you wrote it instead? Text it to me or something?" I nod, knowing I won't be able to speak it aloud.
"I can text it but only if I can watch you delete it.. I can't tell any of the guys, probably ever.. While I write it.. Will you go to see Chap for me..? He terrifies me right now but I need to know he's safe and they'll look after him.. Send them out surfing or something?" She smiles.
"Of course I can Brooke. I'll come right back, you can lock the door if you feel safer. Ryan won't leave but apparently some of the guys are out so Jake and Chap can meet up with them. I'll tell him he can't come here though, he'll wait in the living room, just in case anything untoward happens." I nod and she leaves as I lock the door. I start typing slowly, trying to fight all the flashbacks. Eventually I get the soft toy zebra from the cupboard to help ground me as I write about the worst year and a half of my life. Gina comes back to the door.
"Gina.. Just.. Wait in the living room with Whip.. I'll send you a text telling you to come back.. Then I'll send the actual one when you get here.."
"Okay Brooke. Just be careful. Don't worry if it's too difficult right now. We're going to sort everything out." I hear the receding footsteps and go back to the text, writing as if it's a story and not as if it's what really happened to me.
'The girl looks nervous, first day of secondary school, anyone would be. She stands outside her form room, as everyone else does. Her friend is there, the term 'friend' used loosely. Her 'friend' allowed it to happen, blackmailed her into still being friends with her. A few days later and she stands outside her form room again. This time, her friend isn't there yet. Two boys are though, two boys who chose to hurt her like this. They move closer "Morning Sexy", they begin. The other people in the line do nothing, some watch, some ignore, none help. The boys move closer still, the girl becomes claustrophobic. "Are you my girlfriend now?" One of them asks his hand reaching out. The girl tries to lash out, kick them, anything to get them away. It doesn't work, the boy's hand is on her skin, moving up. She can't do anything now. The bell rings and they stop, step back, everyone acts like nothing happened. The girl learns to avoid being outside form, goes to see other people before school instead. It doesn't always work. For a year and a half, it continues, on and on, until she just can't take it anymore- the fear, the judgement. She asks to move forms, doesn't explain anything, just says it's hard there, she has friends elsewhere. She believes she got away from them for good, no lessons with them, no torturous form time with their eyes constantly on her. When she goes to college, a different college, to make a fresh start, she knows she's escaped. Now, she's not so sure.'
I send Gina a text telling her to come back. As she arrives at the door, I open it and press send before going back to the same position. She must read quickly as she sits next to me. "Brooke.. That should never have happened to you.. Is this why you're so scared..?" I nod slowly.
"They could do it too.." As the words fall out of my mouth I realise how stupid they sound. These guys have been nothing but kind to me for months. "And he's here.. He could.." My head starts to cloud as I panic.
"Don't worry. I understand. What are you going to do then?"
"Stay here.. Chap can go home.. I'll just stay in this room.." She shakes her head.
"That isn't an option Brooke." I rest my head carefully against the bed as I try to fight the darkness. "Brooke.. Are you okay..?" The panic is evident in her voice. As my world goes black, I hear her shout for Whip. 'He can't hurt me' I repeat as a mantra while my mind goes blank.
