One Good Reason

Chapter Seven: One Good Reason

Dan Howell is the meme King

*Dan's POV*

Thankfully, Joss was better in time for Christmas. Her fever was completely gone by Christmas Eve, and the three of us spent the day wrapping present, baking heaps of cookies, and decorating the Christmas tree.

"Hey, Dan!" I turn towards Joss, who's holding a bundle of tinsel in her arms. "Think fast!" I shriek like a girl and jump away when she throws it at me.

Phil shakes his head and arranges the ornaments on the tree. "Dan, where are the Star Trek ornaments?"

"Oh, I dunno Phil, maybe in the box marked 'Star Trek ornaments'?" Joss picks up the box and pretends to dump the ornaments over Phil's head.

"NO JOSS DON'T!" He gasps and scampers away, hiding behind my back. "Daaaaan, Joss is trying to rape me with the Star Trek ornaments!"

"Children, chill." I say with a sigh. "Anyone up for a Starbucks run? They're closing early today because of the holidays and I need a decent coffee if I'm going to survive babysitting you two."

"Hey!" Phil pounds his fist on my back. "Rude."

"Too lazy." Joss shakes her head and flops down on the couch. "Uh...I'm sure Phil would like to go, though. You two need some alone time."

She raises her eyebrows suggestively. Unfortunately, I made the decision a couple of days ago to tell Joss about my crush on Phil. I thought she was too sick and groggy to make anything of it, but the past week Joss has done almost nothing but try and push Phil and I together.

"Sure, I'll go." Phil walks to our hall closet, slides on his shoes, and reaches for his jacket.

"You want anything?" I ask Joss, struggling with the laces on my black Vans.

She smiles and throws me the car keys. "A brother-in-law."

I throw the plastic ornaments at her while Phil laughs.

******************

"I love this song." I sigh happily. I reach over the three coffee cups sitting on Phil's lap and flick his arm.

He flicks me back. "Really? It's a little more pop and way less metal for your usual taste."

"It's not the genre." I say, turning up the volume of the speakers. "It's the lyrics."

Phil nods, and his eyes soften. "Sing it for me."

I raise an eyebrow.

"Please?"

I give Phil an exaggerated eye roll.

"I'm serious Dan! I love your voice and I hardly ever get to hear it!"

It's mostly his use of the word 'love' that gets me to sing. In usual me fashion, I wait until the last little bit to really sing like I mean it.

"My friends and family
They don't understand
They fear they'll lose so much if
You take my hand
But for you,you
I'd lose it all.

So give me one good reason why I should never make a change
Baby if you'd want me then all of this will go away

My house in Budapest
My hidden treasure chest
Golden grand piano
My beautiful Castillo
Oh for You, you
You,you
I'd lose it all."

We drive in silent for a few minutes before Phil breaks the ice.

"Me." He says softly.

"What?" I turn to look at Phil, almost choking when I realize he has tears in his eyes.

"I'm your one good reason, Dan!" He shouts. "You talk about how people don't change and that on the inside people are cold and pointless and theirabsolutely no reason to live anymore, but you're wrong!" His voice drops dangerously low. "You're so wrong."

"Phil, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"Hell you didn't!" I jump, startled by his yelling. "I've gotten myself all tangled up, okay? I'm in too deep now so you can stop pretending. You can stop being nervous and shaky and boarded up and start being the person you told me you've always wanted to be! I'm sorry, Dan, if this isn't the life you wanted. If you didn't want to be born into a world with parents who don't care and critics who care too much. But this is the life you got." Phil stares at me with his blue, blue eyes. "You got me, Dan. I'm that one good reason. And I'm sorry if you hate it."

"Hate it?" I shake my head. "Oh no Phil, this isn't hating."

"What is it then, Dan?"

I open my mouth to tell Phil 'those three words' but I stop myself. I can't do it, not yet and not here. I'm not ready.

Will I ever be ready?

Phil stares out the window angrily. I see his reflection in the side door mirrors, and hear his crying.

Little white flakes begin to drift lazily from the sky. My mum used to tell Joss and I that while raining is the angel's tears, the snowflakes are little pieces of paper with angel's wishes written on them. Mum would tell Joss and I to catch the snowflakes and put our wishes on them, too, so when they melted God would get our wishes.

This was before she got tired of having kids, of course.

I roll down my window and stick my hand out, cupping to catch the snowflakes. "What are you doing?" Phil asks.

I smile. "I'm making wishes. Duh."

Phil looks at me like I'm crazy. Judging from what I'm about to do next, I might as well be.

I wipe the water from the melted snowflakes off on my jeans. "You asked me how I felt about you, if not hate."

Phil bit his lip. "Dan, I overreacted and I'm sorry, okay? Just please don't guilt trip me, anything but-"

"I don't hate you." I cut him off, talking loudly to try and build up my confidence. "It's quite the opposite, actually."

Phil realizes what I'm about to say only a second before the words leave my mouth.

I take his hand in mine. "Phil Lester, I just might be a bit in love with you."

Phil's eyes widen, and his lips turn up in the slightest smile. "Dan, you idiot, has anyone ever told you that it isn't hard to love you?"

I shrug. "No?" It's hard to see where the conversation is going, but Phil hasn't let go of my hand or yelled at me, so I must've done something right.

"Well, it isn't." Phil kisses my cheek. "On the contrary, I almost couldn't stop myself."

I grin and turn the radio back on, this time actually enjoying the cheesy pop love songs.

OH MY GOD AWWWW

AWWW

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