Neophyte

Bonding

Metztli was inside a kizh where she learned that she would stay alongside Mariana and Valentina. She remembered the model kizh in the Mission during her modern era. Whenever she volunteered at the Mission and gave tours, Metztli mentioned how the Tongva had lived in the past. However, now that she was inside a kizh from the past, it felt exciting to have the opportunity to experience what her ancestors did. 

While sitting down and going through her bag, the thought of her ancestors came to her mind. "Hmm, I wonder if I even have met them? Were they part of this time of history?" she wondered. Her thoughts were interrupted when Valentina entered with a wooden chest. "Oh, did you need help?"

"No, everything was taken off the cart."

"Well, that's good. Where is Mariana?"

"She is helping the tribe's women preparing the meal. I told her that we could help but she insisted that I rest along with you. Let me prepare a fire."

Metztli looked confused but then remembered that there was a man-made fireplace in the center of the kizh. It was made of simple stones that made a circle, and wood was also in the center.  She watched as Valentina took a small but long wooden stick and a bow. The wooden stick was put inside the bow, which was then placed on top of another wooden block. Valentina began to spin the smaller wooden stick with the bow on top of the wooden block. Metztli watched with intrigue, and after a minute, smoke became apparent.  Valentina did a few spins until the smoke got stronger. She took out the wooden stick and gently blew on the smoke.

Sparks of fire were made. After a couple more gentle blows, the fire grew larger until it was finally ignited.

Metztli was amazed.

"What you never seen a fire lit before?" Valentina asked while sitting by the fire.

"Huh? Oh, sorry about that. I was being thoughtful. Honestly, I'm excited being here. It has been a while since I have been in a warm community."

Valentina raised an eyebrow. "Nonantzin said that the Bishop told her that you were a traveling herbalist. I haven't seen you do much of healing during your stay during the Mission."

Since they were alone, Metztli suspected that Valentina wanted to find out more about her. Like the Bishop, Valentina didn't fully trust Metztli. "And I thought I was slowly earning her trust." Metztli smiled, "Well, your mother has been giving me other responsibilities. I can't just disobey her. If I were allowed to help people, then I could show more of my skills. Still, although I traveled, it doesn't mean I have seen all the beauty that the world has to offer.

"Xinechtlapohui."

"Huh? What does that mean?"

"It means to tell it to me, explain it to me."

"Oh, right. When people think of travelers, they often associate traveling with seeing many beautiful places. That can be the case, but it isn't always so. Sometimes you see the ugly sides, too."

Valentina crossed her arms, looking intrigued. "The land is not ugly, it was what we do with the land that makes it so."

Metztli nodded. "I agree. What I should have said is that when one travels, one gets to see the harsh realities of humanity. I have seen many people live in poverty, begging for money or food, I have seen people treat others like animals."

"You say that, but when you saw what happened to Anna Maria, it traumatized you. It would seem that you haven't seen the worst of cruelties."

It was true. Seeing Anna Maria give birth, being punished and killed for her newborn dying was traumatizing. It was something that she would never forget. Metztli hadn't truly seen the true cruelties of humanity, and she hoped not to do so again. "Yes, I've seen the harsh realities, not cruel realities. The way you reacted seemed that it wasn't new to you. You grew up with it, didn't you?"

"Quema (Yes). My family and I didn't react, but it wasn't new to us. It was something we were used to for many years. Although, my family and I were allowed to live outside the Mission."

"Oh, you used to live outside the Mission?"

Valentina nodded. "My mother made my brother and me visit the Mission from time to time. Bishop Victoriano educated and protected us. The Bishop and my mother were friends since forever ever since our father died. I have seen so many of my people die due to the Padres. Although the Bishop and a few Padres have a good heart, it doesn't hide the fact that they do nothing to make change."

Metztli's smile died down. She couldn't blame Valentina for feeling the way she did, but Metztli didn't feel comfortable with Bishop Victoriano doing so much for her and her family. "I can't blame you, but remember, men like the Bishop are just one. They can't create change by themselves. I mean, you can't deny that you and your family are very fortunate to have some form of protection. You-"

"Nonantzin and the Bishop call this protection, but it feels like a prison. Being inside the Mission is suffocating. It is a brutal reminder of what my people go through and suffer. Also, it reminds me how life is never fair. Why is it that my family didn't have to suffer and others did."

"Oh, Valentina. What you are going through is survivor's guilt."

"Survivor's guilt?"

"It's something I have observed during my travels. When someone survives a traumatic experience, they often feel guilty about having survived. The survivor begins to question themselves with many questions on why they were able to have it easy and why others couldn't. What you have to understand and accept is that life was never fair, and it will never be fair. If one refuses to accept that reality, then one will have a difficult life." Metztli noticed that Valentina became silent, and she continued, "Don't feel guilty, Valentina. You have empathy, and that is something special. Also, you are in a position to help others who need help."

Valentina looked at the fire, looking thoughtful. "I am trapped in the Mission. How could I possibly help? I couldn't act the way you did when they lashed Anna Maria."

"There are many things you can do. Sometimes the smallest acts can lead to a bigger difference and meaning. The fact that you help your mother heal the injured and the sick. Those acts are contributing to helping others. You did more than I ever could. I could save Anna Maria, but the fact that you healed people and that is part of your traditions, which the Padres are trying to take away. You practicing herbalism is your act of defiance." Metztli chuckled, "I mean it's hypocritical of them that they rely on your people's traditions to help them and others survive."

The women were silent, but they began to giggle. 

"When you will teach me those fighting skills that you used against Pascual?"

"How about tomorrow? We can ask Guillermo to help us out. When will you begin teaching me the language?"

"We can start tonight. Our tongue will be spoke tonight and I will break it into steps." Valentina stood up. "The sun is setting, we must go and meet with the others."

Metztli stood. "I agree. Let's go!"