This is for the girl down the hall
Misused and abused
Yeah, yeah yeah
Pick ya head up love, smile
This is for you
Girl I know sometimes that I mistreat you, and you still come back
And I see your homegirls try to reach you, but you ain't hearing none of that
They try to get through, they say I ain't the move
I don't know, cause girl it might be true
When they tell you, you should walk away but you stay anyway
Girl I think it's best for me to say this, I ain't no good
And your heart ain't something I should play with
So let's get it understood
I ain't trying to ruin your life
If anything I just want to make it right
And tell the judge I ain't even gotta plead my case
I can tell my baby to her face
I was just your nigga next door
But girl I see more for you,
And you ain't gotta have no fear, no I'll always be here for you, girl I'm here for you
And I know you may not end up with me
'Cause I'm still playing outchea in these streets
But I'm just saying
You deserve better, I'm saying, you deserve better.
'You deserve-August Alsina'
Jaye.
These last couple of days... they been amazing. No we didnt have sex or love whatever you call it. We just chilled. I got to know her a lil better. Everything was perfect,, no drama,, no hoes ... just us. It was like 6a.m onna Monday morning so i got up from the bed slowly so nikk wouldn't wake up.. Smh no wonder all these hoes so attracted to her. I know i would never actually have her to myself so im not even gone get caught up. I went to the downstairs bathroom and showered so wouldn't wake her... i got dressed for school and wrote her this...
"Nikk."I smiled just writting her name but all that quickly faded."Nikk... these last couple of days been great maan fuck allat they been PERFECT,, i had a great time. I'm glad i got to know you a little better. Also i appreciate you letting me into your beautiful ass home....BUT now that were back at school iknow it all has to end. Dont worry i aint onnat dumb shit. Im not gone mess up what you got with these females. Honestly, i thank you for everything, but we can't be together. Dont worry im fine.. imma just walk to school. Maybe ill see you around. Goodmorning ...... See Ya Nik.
Iknow yall prolly like wtf wrong with you bruhh but I'm not new to this game maan. And im not gone sit here and act brand new. Iknow how the game goes.. they make everything all perfect.. they make what feels like something turn out into being NOTHING. I BE DAMN if i get played. That shits bout as dead as my pops who keeps leaving in and out of my life. This? What we had? It aint shit. We go to school and everythings gone be all that it ever was. Me staying to myself and her with all these hoes. I cant top that.. and like Angel said.. i shouldn't have to compete.
TEXTING :(6:42am)
Jaye: Ayee A?
Angel: wessuh?
Jaye: you up?
Angel: -.- nahh im sleep texting. She play to much but that kinda was common sense i just had so much on my mind.
Jaye: stfu... im omw over there. Ima walk with you to school.
Angel:iight just come in.. moms at work so imma leave the door unlocked.
Jaye:Bet.
....
Nikk.
I woke up. But i something was missing. My eyes was closed i felt for my warmth but she wasnt there. I opened my eyes and she was gone. I ran downstairs and looked everywhere. Her stuff was even gone. Then i saw her note:
"Nikk... these last couple of days been great maan fuck allat they been PERFECT,, i had a great time. I'm glad i got to know you a little better. Also i appreciate you letting me into your beautiful ass home....BUT now that were back at school iknow it all has to end. Dont worry i aint onnat dumb shit. Im not gone mess up what you got with these females. Honestly, i thank you for everything, but we can't be together. Dont worry im fine.. imma just walk to school. Goodmorning.... See Ya Nik.
Since my life changed.. i never had a heart ya know? I kinna coached myself not to let shit bother me. If i wanted to i could kill a nigga and spit on his grave and not feel a fucking thing. Ya that shits cold. Trust me ikno but living the life i live. This love and shit aint shit and as far as i knew it was never gone be shit. Females came at me left and right but aint none of them gone hold me down like they say they are and ikno that. As a stud we can feel whats real and whats not,because at the end of the day we are a female. I felt real in her ya know. But reading this shit maan... it really hit me. Seems like she thought she wasn't shit to me and all i was ever trynna show her was the opposite. The life, the money, the hoes, all of a sudden wasnt shit to me. i didn't need it anymore .. i just needed her and her only. Smh my life to fucked up and maybe this is meant.. maybe she deserves better . All of a sudden all this sadness turnt into some hiding anger. I got dressed and headed to school.
Jaye.
While talking to Angel about our project we finished like a week ago. I realize i forgot to tell her to call my mom Saturday Morning.
"SHIT! "
"What's wrong jaye?"
"Smh ikno this is gonna sound wierd. But i was at nik's hous for the whole weekend i lied and told moms i was gone be here. You was supposed to call here and tell here i was-" she burst out laughing. I was confused my ass was gone get smoked when i got home."Wtf you laughing for.?"
"I already took care of it"
"What? Whatchu mean?"
"Jaye,, you forgot? Nikk my bro. She tells me everything. Iknew where you was at. I been called ur moms. She said alright and have fun. Friday night nik hit my line....
(Flashback:Nik && Angel's Convo)
"A?"
"Wessuh bro ?"
"I needa favor sis."
"I gotchu. Spit "
"I wanna take jaye to my crib tonight. I really wanna try this out. Im really feeling her. This aint like jo other chick i been with. I just really need your help with this."
"Text her ,, pick her up,, bring her to your crib and leave the rest to me"
"Thanks mann"
"Yeah yeah yeah just do her right man. Dont make me regret this. She don't deserve watchu did to them others or even what they did to you."
"Fashoo."
(NOW)
"Wait. you knew about this? "
"Yeah. Since day one"
"Why didn't you text me?, why didn't you tell me bruhh" i felt my heart drop. I probably just ruined what couldve have been the best thing to me. This wasn't Angel's fault this aint nothing but my past hunting me all over again...
This kinnda short depending on how you feel...this is day 4 but i will update again today to catch up to my time.. thanks for the votes and comments please leave more. Oh and do me a favor.. go check out my Girlfriend/Stubby books. @NickiMcdaniels i would normally tag her but ion want her to read this yet, If she hasn't already. Anyways thanks in advance. -JayeMariell-
