slide away {lorenzo berkshire}

53. me and the devil

"When you are not fed love on a silver spoon, you learn to lick it off knives."
- Lauren Eden

~~~~~~

Cassie Avery

The cold, ornate walls of Malfoy Manor felt more suffocating than usual tonight. I stood in the dimly lit corridor, wand tucked into my sleeve as the others moved quietly around me. Lucius Malfoy stood near the fireplace, silent and rigid, his silver-headed cane clutched like it was the only thing keeping him upright. Yaxley leaned against the wall, expression blank, and Greyback... Greyback just grinned, wolfish and eager, like he could already taste blood in the air.

Mattheo stood beside me, pulling on his gloves, the weight of his presence settling heavily against my side. He didn't say much, just a quick nod when our eyes met, telling me that I had to go along with this, that there wasn't a choice. As if he hadn't already made that clear enough the night before.

"Ready?", he finally asked, his voice low, rough.

I nodded, even though I wasn't. I'd told myself I could handle this - that I had to handle this - but my palms were slick against my wand. This wasn't burning a mark into a wall or intimidating a shopkeeper too cowardly to pay. This was taking someone.

"We leave in five. Stay sharp. No mistakes.", Yaxley snarled.

The words hung in the air, cold and final.

I stepped closer to Mattheo, my voice barely above a whisper. "Why are we doing this? What's the point of - of taking Ollivander?".

He looked at me, brow furrowing like he hadn't expected me to question it. Then his voice dropped low enough that only I could hear. "It's about the Elder Wand."

My stomach turned. "What?".

"Information," he said simply, eyes already turning back toward the others. "Don't think about it too much, Cass. It's just business."

I swallowed the lump in my throat, trying to steady my breathing. Mattheo's gaze flicked to mine again, this time softer, almost protective.

"Stay close," he murmured, just loud enough for me to hear, slipping his hand lightly to my lower back in a rare gesture of quiet comfort.

The group Apparated together, the familiar wrenching sensation hitting my stomach every time.

The street was silent except for the faint tap of boots against the cobblestones. The lamps of Diagon Alley flickered unnaturally dim - something about the air felt thick, heavier than it had when I'd walked here freely as a student, years ago.

Yaxley gave a sharp signal and they moved fast - Greyback breaking down the door with a single brutal kick, Lucius sweeping inside with his wand raised, the whole thing executed with mechanical precision.

And there he was - frail, thin, still clutching a bundle of papers. His eyes darted up, wide behind his glasses, and I saw the moment he knew.

"Evening," Yaxley said, almost casual, though his hand was pressed to Ollivander's chest hard enough to make the old man wheeze.

Greyback yanked Ollivander up by the collar, throwing him toward Mattheo. Ollivander's glasses fell, shattering across the floor.

Ollivander's mouth opened - probably to scream - but Mattheo's hand slammed over it. "Do it," he muttered to me, eyes flashing, impatient.

For a second, I hesitated.

I stood frozen, heart hammering in my throat, watching Mattheo's expression remain completely impassive, like he wasn't even seeing Ollivander, just another step in the plan. When his eyes finally cut to me, there was no softness there, no trace of the boy who stayed up with me when I couldn't sleep or kissed my hand when he thought no one was looking.

There was just this person that I didn't recognise - glaring at me with eyes blazing. "Now!".

So I moved, casting the binding spell before I could think too long, the cords whipping out and snapping tight around Ollivander's wrists. He stumbled, muffled protests lost under Mattheo's hand. I stepped forward, my stomach twisting at the sound, but my voice - a voice that didn't even sound like my own anymore - stayed steady as I muttered the silencing charm.

They slipped him out of the shop and into an alleyway. And I just followed. I did nothing. Like always.

Mattheo's hand clamped around my wrist, pulling me close just as Yaxley Disapparated them away. I barely had a second to brace before the world twisted violently and Malfoy Manor's familiar, icy air slammed into my lungs.

They dragged Ollivander down the hall before I could fully process what we'd just done. His eyes caught mine for a second - wide, terrified, so much worse up close - and then the heavy door slammed shut behind them.

I stood there frozen, wand still in my hand, my breath loud in my ears. Mattheo was watching me, jaw tight, eyes unreadable under the hood.

"First time's the worst," he said finally, his voice quieter now, as if that was supposed to be comforting in any way whatsoever.

I didn't answer. I just made a silent promise to myself. It wasn't just the first time. It would be the last. And I would rather face the consequences of that than participate in anything like that again.

The panic hit me like a wave crashing down - suffocating, relentless. My chest tightened until I thought it might break, breaths coming in shallow, quick gasps.

I took off, letting my feet lead me to the furthest corner of the manor, where I couldn't hear his screams anymore. I kept running until I reached the balcony.

"Cassie?", Mattheo's voice cut through the ringing in my ears.

I gripped the edge of the stone, leaning over the ledge, my gaze fixed on the ground below.

Mattheo was right behind me.

"Take a deep breath". But his words didn't soothe - they were too rough, too clipped. I knew he meant well, but he wasn't Lorenzo. He didn't have that quiet patience, that calm steadiness that could ground me when my mind spiraled.

He stepped closer, hesitating, his hands awkward but steady as they hovered near mine. And for a moment, I thought he might say something, anything, to make this better.

But then his expression hardened, and he pulled back, gripping my wrists - not harshly, but firm. "You can't do this, Cassie. You can't panic like this every time it gets ugly. You think they'll care if you break down? You think they'll show mercy? They'll eat you alive if you look weak. This isn't the time to fall apart."

I tried to breathe, but his words made it worse, like I was somehow disappointing him by being human.

"Look at me," he snapped when I ducked my head. "You think anyone else out there gets to panic? You think they'll care if you're scared? You're stronger than this - act like it."

"I can't-". My voice cracked, tears spilling before I could stop them.

He sighed, frustrated, shaking his head like I was a puzzle he couldn't quite solve. "Merlin, Cassie... you can't do this every time something gets hard."

His tone was supposed to be firm, maybe motivational, but it felt like another weight pressing on my chest. All he gave me was the sharp edge I'd grown used to. He stood abruptly, running a hand through his hair.

"I'm going to clean up," he muttered, stepping away without another glance.

And just like that, I was alone again - breathing shallow, tears drying on my cheeks, wondering how the hell I'd gotten here.

~~~~~~

I think Cassie has officially hit rock bottom at this point

I know the arguments between the two of them and the things Mattheo says to her might be getting a bit repetitive but I feel like that's realistic. She's stuck in the cycle of a vvv toxic relationship.

I've got another few big plot twists coming and I can't wait for your reactions