Pulse

beat twenty-three

Eden sat by the window of the hospital cafeteria, an IV attached to her arm. It was snowing outside, more than the other days. The hospital yard was covered in a white blanket occasionally wrinkled by rare footsteps. It started getting cold, and the cafeteria was not the warmest place, but Eden never minded the cold.

"I know you don't want to see me, but please don't leave," a voice came from beside her, and she looked up to see Elina. She was smiling kindly at her, a serene look on her face. The brown in her eyes was calming; gentle, slender fingers pushed her hair behind her ear; she stood tall so Eden had to crane her neck to look up at her. Her whole presence made Eden feel at ease. She pulled out the chair across from Eden, sitting down, her eyes skipping from the needle in her hand to the scar on her face. Though her gaze wasn't judgmental, but kind.

"You know, I had so many things to tell you, but right now, I can't find anything to say," Elina said, followed by a quiet chuckle as she fiddled with her hands atop the table, making sweater paws out of her thin brown vest. Eden's hand, the one attached to the IV, was stretched out across the table, her sleeveless hands covered in small goosebumps, the un-flattering hospital gown not providing any warmth either. Eden felt the needle in her arm, but the small stinging and the cold made Eden feel like she was alive; and that was what she needed. Elina glanced at her hand; once, twice, and slowly- as if she was approaching a scared animal- she intertwined her fingers with Eden's.

Eden thought she'd feel uncomfortable by now, but being with Elina felt natural. It felt normal to sit with this girl, and the silence was not awkward.

"What are you thinking?" Eden asked her, as she noticed tears in Elina's eyes. She tried to wipe them away, but they started spilling out of her eyes and gliding down her cheeks like somebody turned the tap on inside her. Her lips stretched into a smile, and had she not been crying, Eden would think she was just fine.

"I'm sorry, I-"

"It's okay," Eden cut her off, giving her hand a squeeze. Elina smiled.

"I just missed you," she breathed out. "I know you don't want to see us, but I miss my sister. While we were away, you were all I could think about, and- I can't-" Elina couldn't finish her sentence, so Eden just gave her hand a squeeze, and smiled a little.

"It's fine, you don't have to explain," she said, and Elina nodded, wiping her tears and taking a deep breath.

Eden had not thought that she would feel so concerned about somebody crying; but each of Elina's tears broke Eden's heart a little. She was a figure of poise; her skin was porcelain, eyes sparkling, lips soft and hair framing her face perfectly. Eden felt as if she was looking at a picture of herself that held no scars and had no imperfections, but as another tear left Elina's cheek, Eden realized that maybe you didn't have to look broken to be broken.

She felt Elina's gaze on her scar. She did not want to look directly, as if she was afraid of Eden's reaction, but her gaze kept coming back to it. She didn't want to tell her not to look, but she was not comfortable with her looking either.

She was different than Ace, in that manner. They both made her feel peaceful; but only Ace could look at her and still keep that peace. Only he could look at her scar, and Eden would know that there was no hidden pity or inner squeamishness.

"Does it hurt?" Elina asked, and her expression after she said it seemed as if she did not want to say that out loud.

"I don't even feel it anymore," Eden admitted, shrugging. "I know it's not pretty to look at."

It was as if Elina wanted to contradict, but she knew that she did not have a valid point. It was not a pretty scar. But it did not make Eden any less magical in her eyes. She hadn't seen her sister in a long time, and now that she had her right in front of her eyes, she felt an immense pool of emotions twirling in her stomach.