You Left Me Stranded

Chapter 14

About an hour later, we pulled into Alan's house. I had to force myself to move, to get get out of the car. I had to at least make it to the couch inside. I can't just not move. I have to. So, I did. I kept my body moving until I made it to the couch. When I sat down, it was like a light switch had flipped. Every emotion I felt was being brought out by the tears I was crying. I didn't care who could hear or see me, even though it was just Alan. Shit, Alan. I looked up for a second and noticed Alan wasn't near me. "Alan?!" I started crying more. I didn't care. I can't care anymore. No one loves me. The only person I have ever loved was with someone and I couldn't stand it.

I felt hands around me, picking me up. Startled, I yelped and looked up. It was Alan. He carried me to the studio and laid me on the couch in there. He sat next to me, and gently put me in his lap while rocking me until I felt relaxed and quit crying. "Shh, I got you. Want to tell me what has my bestfriend so upset?" I sighed and looked up at him and the back down. "Austin. He.. he has a girlfriend, Alan. I feel so stupid. I should've known he wouldn't have liked me. I just wish I wasn't so stupid."

I got up and sat in the rolling chair across from him. "I mean, look at me, Al. I'm ugly and gross. I can't even keep myself from doing this." I rolled up the sleeve to my jacket and showed him my cuts. I looked down at them and a tear trickled down my face then hit one of the scars. "I feel so stupid. I tried my whole life to get Austin to realize how much I love him and he doesn't see it. He doesn't realize that it's me he should be with." I closed my eyes shut tight.

I felt my arm being lifted and kissed. It was Alan. I looked at him and butterflies started going in my tummy. No one has ever done that for me. Not even Austin. "Ashlen, you are the most amazing person I know. You're my bestfriend. I'm not gonna tell you things will get better because I don't know what the future will bring, but I do know that everything will be okay. I'll make sure of it. You hurting makes me upset. So, I'll do everything in my power to prevent that." He looked at me and smiled. I sighed and said, "Thank you, Alan. You're the best." I smiled and gave him a hug.

"Does Austin know you're here?" Alan looked at me and waited for me to answer. "I told him that I got sick and that you were picking me up. I don't want to go there tonight. Can.. Can I stay here for tonight?" I looked at him and he smiled. "Of course you can, Ash. You're welcome to stay here as long as you want." I smiled as he gave me a hug. I am so grateful to have Alan. I'd be so lost without him. Pulling away, I looked at my phone to see the time. 3:57pm. "I know what will cheer you up." He patted my leg and smiled. I looked at him confused as he reached for his guitar. "You always listen to this song when you are upset, so I thought it'd be perfect for me to sing it for you." I smiled at him. "When You Can't Sleep At Night by you guys?" He nodded his head and started playing.

Here in this world I'm awaked with mistakes
But it's love that keeps fueling me
Fueling me

Pretty little lady with the swollen eyes
Would you show them to me?
I know I'm not that perfect
But you stay awhile
Baby, then you will see

Miles away I can still feel you
Lay your head down on my embrace
My embrace
Far away

Pretty little lady with the swollen eyes
Would you show them to me?
I know I'm not that perfect
But you stay awhile
Baby, then you will see

Don't give up, baby
I know that it's shaky
Just let love consume us
Consume us...

Here in this world I'm awaked with mistakes
But it's love that keeps fueling me
Fueling me to love you

Miles away I can still feel you
Lay your head down on my embrace
Be not afraid to love me

Pretty little lady with the swollen eyes
Would you show them to me?
I know I'm not that perfect
But you stay awhile
Baby, then you will see

I smiled at him and gave him a tight hug. "Thank you, so much, Alan. I never would be able to live without you. You're my bestfriend. I don't care what happens, you'll always be my bestfriend. I love you." I felt him smile against my shoulder then pulled away. "I love you, too, Ashlen. Now, let's go. Whatever you want to do, we'll do." He smiled and I returned one back. We got up and left the studio. "Movies!"