Diary of a Loner..

Diary of a Loner.. 7

 Dear Diary,

Life’s good. That’s all I have to say. It really is amazing, I can’t believe how much things have turned around for me in the past month. Like if I think about it I was miserable a month ago, I had no friends and I was sick of this godforsaken town. But now I’m the happiest girl in the world, I have made amazing new friends and I’m really starting to see the beauty in this place. It’s all thanks to Daniel, if I’d never met him none of this would have happened. Wow that makes me so grateful of Chris for giving me this job and of my mom for encouraging me to go for it.

I love summer, no sorry I love thissummer. It’s made me realise the beauty in life and the beauty in others. Speaking of others I’m meeting up with Daniel later. I can’t wait I’m so excited just the thought of seeing him again gives me this weird fuzzy feeling in my stomach. I really have fallen for him, hard. I can’t help it though. When I’m around him I just feel so complete and happy. He makes me really happy. I haven’t really seen him much since Lisa’s party because I’ve been so caught up with work and I have missed him so much. Ok yes I have been on the phone to him every night since then but I still miss him.

Talking just isn’t the same as actually being with him. It doesn’t make up for his presence. I can’t feel him or be with him fully when I’m on the phone. My stomach gets these weird aches too when he’s not around, what the hell is up with that? Ugh I just miss him too much, I have to see him or I will cry it’s been too long. It’s kind of crazy how hard I’ve fallen for him, more importantly though how fast. It’s only been a month since I’ve met him. A month that is all and I’m already feeling these kinds of things with this guy. I can’t help it though the way that he makes me feel the fun that we have together and we get on so well. It’s the easiest thing in the world being with him. I don’t have to pretend to be anyone, I don’t have to be fake to impress. All I have to do is be myself.

I don’t even want to think about what will happen at the end of the summer. I don’t think I can let him go, not after what he’s brought to my life. I’m just not going to think about it, I’ll fight that battle when it comes. Mom and dad are after meeting him.  Oh I was so nervous that day. I don’t even know why because I knew they would love him and completely approve as well but I couldn’t help but get butterflies at the thought of him meeting my parents. I couldn’t stop from grinning like a fool when he was with them. He just got on so well with them, there was no weird awkwardness and he was so polite. That day he practically stayed the night he didn’t leave for home until about twelve at night! Mom and dad would probably have actually let him stayed if I asked. Separate rooms of course but still imagine having my parents being ok with my boyfriend staying over in my house.

I’m lucky they like him so much or else I wouldn’t be trusted or allowed to go out with him and I’d be a wreck if that happened. I’d actually be completely lost. It’s kind of scary how much I seem to need him. Maybe I’m getting too attached, I have to be careful. I can’t open my heart up to him too much especially not now. No it’s too soon, oh but god I already feel that way. What if he doesn’t even like me that much, I’m going to end up with my heart broken. This has to go slowly I have to stop myself from running away with this. Daam I’m going to be all freaking out on our date tonight because of this but look he does like me and he does like me a lot too. I know that but I just have to make sure I’m not too wound up in this relationship. Ok I’m ready, I’m calm and I’m going to go on an amazing date with Daniel.