Changing

Chapter 12

            I jumped up and searched the cave, but she was no where to be found.

            “No, no Bonnie where are you!” I pleaded my voice shooting through two octaves.

            I sprinted out of the cave, but she wasn’t outside either.

            What do I do now? Where could she have gone? How will I ever be able to take care of her if I keep losing her this way?

            My body trembled with the stress as it raced up and down my spine.

            “Bonnie…” I called again in a broken voice. The only sound was the wind whistling through the leaves. Not even the birds were singing.

            I had to go after her, but how? Should I go as a bird, or a horse? As a bird I could cover more distance and see more space, but I had no idea where she could have gone, and I might search in the wrong places.

            But as a horse maybe I could follow her sent… I still wasn’t totally sure about these abilities I suddenly possessed, but what other option did I have?

            I tried to change, but I couldn’t. The stress had me consumed in its fervent grasp and I could not shake it off enough to change. 

            “Gah!” I groaned, and folded to the floor.

            I lay my head on my knees and tried to calm my racing heart, by breathing deeply.

            At first it seemed like a wasted effort. My mind kept distorting around the “what ifs.” 

            I squeezed my eyes tighter, trying to banish the thoughts from my mind. And finally my heart slowed.

            I got up quickly and changed before the urgency could seize me again.

            I jumped into a gallop, my muscles rippling under my hide. My main and tail fanned out behind me like white banners.

            I kept my head up high, with my nostrils wide, to better take in the faint smell that was Bonnie. 

            She was at least moving in her wolf form, for which I was grateful. She would be able to protect herself better that way.

            The nerves caught up to me again, and flowed through my blood stream like electricity, mixing in with the adrenaline, filling me with acid. The heat washed over me covering my body in perspiration, though I had just barely started to run.

            My head pounded behind my eyes, and my stomach felt like something was crushing it. I felt so bad that I just wanted to stop, fall to the ground and cry. But I couldn’t.

            Black and white dots mottled my vision. I was afraid that I would pass out, but even so I kept going, missing the speeding trees around me my inches. Their long weaving branches were not as easy to avoid, and I was soon covered with new scrapes, bleeding tears.

            The ground quivered under the assail of my hooves, and animals startled, would jump out of their hiding places screaming their alarm.

            I could not tell the difference between the animals. They were all smudges of color to me.

            Their cries were also distorted by the ringing in my ears, that would never end, and kept getting louder and louder.