"Luke, make them go away," I sobbed. He stayed there, in bed with me, his long arms wrapped around me, holding me tightly.
"I don't know how, buddy. I would if I could," he said softly, squeezing me hard. When he holds me like this, it kind of makes the hole in my chest close up on itself.
"I love you, Luke." I cry. This time I didn't really care about the no homo thing. Girls didn't seem to care about people thinking they were lesbians, so why should boys? Parents should be raising their children the same. Like, who even said pink was a fucking girl colour?
"I love you, too, Mikey." he kisses my hair really lightly. It feels slightly awkward, being here with him just like this, because we, like, anal-ed. But it was still nice.
"He doesn't," a voice whispered. It wasn't Luke, and it wasn't Gereon, or Olivia. It was that one creepy guy with the long nails and hair. The one that wanted to hurt me. He told me he could control me.
Suddenly, I let out a screech, right into Luke's ear, making him jump up.
"What? What is it?"
"They're back, and they're gonna hurt me. Help me," I scream, sitting up to rock myself back and forth.
"It's all in your head," Luke said, crawling over on his knees. "It's okay. it's okay."
He wrapped his arms round me, nuzzling his face onto my shoulder blade. Slowly, he started to hum against my skin in an attempt to soothe me.
"You're okay, it's all in your head, baby. You're safe, and I'm right here. You're okay." he whispered with his lips pressed close to me.
I calmed down, and pulled away from Luke. Gereon was sitting right beside him, slowly running his hand up his thigh.
"Wouldn't you just hate to see him die? You already lost your girlfriend. What could be worse? Your best friend?"
I started crying again.
"Luke, you have to go away." I didn't look at him. I returned to my position of rocking back and forth.
"I don't trust you alone, Michael." he hesitantly said. It's like he was considering leaving. He doesn't want me.
My hands made their way to my face, slowly running my nails down, I was scratching myself. I felt the sting as I repeatedly dragged my fingers across my eyes. "He'll. Hurt. You." I gritted my teeth.
Luke sat beside me, unmoving in a cross legged position. "Who?"
I looked up at him, Gereon still sat there, beside him.
"Gereon."
"Is he one of the voices?" he asked curiously. He didn't seem scared, and he hadn't left me yet.
I nodded, putting my head down again. My eyes stung now, and Luke noticed. "Your eyes are all red," he whispered, planting little kisses along the scratch marks.
It didn't bother me how touchy-feely he was being. He was often like this, he was a rather needy boy; he always had to be touching the person he was with.
"You still look pretty to me," he smiled.
I felt heat rush up to my cheeks.
"You like that? Do you like being called pretty?" he questioned. I figured he was trying to take my mind off of the situation.
I nodded slowly, feeling myself blush even more. In truth, I really did like being called pretty; I was usually the one calling other people pretty and never the other way around. It felt nice.
"Your cheeks are all pink you right now and you look adorable. Aw." he complimented with a smile. It was this really nice nose-scrunching smile that he didn't do often. It showed all of his teeth, and his eyes squinted up. If you make Luke smile like this, it kinda makes your day.
"Thank you," I giggled. Fucking giggled.
"Want to watch a movie?" he asked. I looked at him. I was aware of Netflix and Chill, but I didn't think Luke would ever pull that on me.
I nodded as he jumped up and looked through the movie book. Finally picking one, he slid it out of its case and into the slot.
"What one?" I asked. He only looked at me and pretended to zip his lips.
He sat down next to me, and pulled my body into him. Which, I don't know how he did considering I was approximately the same weight as a medium-sized whale. Like, I wasn't fat, nor was I skinny or athletic. I was kind of curvy, bigger than my friends. Luke didn't seem to mind, and I thought that Addie didn't either.
As I saw the pink opening credits I knew what it was.
"Mean Girls, really?" I laughed.
"It's my favourite," he smiled.
"Shut up, Luke."
"Eat shit, Mikey."
一个
"Michael, are you comfy?" Luke mumbled against the blankets. He had made sure he properly cacooned, tucked and wrapped me carefully in the comforters as we continued to watch movies. We were watching Tarzan, I think.
"Yeah," I smiled. He kissed my forehead and laid back down, wrapping his arms around the bundle of blankets.
We laid there, in silence, not looking each other or anything; just laying. It didn't feel like anything. I wasn't sure if I had a crush on Luke, when he was with me I think I did. He made my tummy feel fluttery. I felt that way about Addie, but after a couple months it went away. I didn't like that. I wanted someone who would always make my heart beat faster.
"Luke?" I whispered, peering up at him.
He looked at me, an eyebrow raised. I think he did this so he would open his mouth and get a hair in it. There was a lot of hair on the blankets.
"Can I ask you a question?" I inquired quietly, in a coy tone of voice.
He nodded.
I stared at him and went to open my mouth. His eyes stared back at me, all blue and innocent and wonderful. I couldn't do it. Those eyes wouldn't look at the me the same if he didn't like me back.
Besides, I wasn't even sure if I did like him. Maybe it was like a friend crush because he was so nice to me.
"Do you want a pudding cup?" I questioned instead.
He jumped up. "Yes! Do you have butterscotch?"
I nodded.
"Yas!" he screamed excitedly. I smile and get up and go to the kitchen.
"I love you, Mimi!"
lol mimi
there's like two chapters left lmao
also I saw 5sos last night I cried
