My Saving Grace (book 2)

June 20, 2025

A/N
Brief mention of self harm just after the ... It's not detailed just mentioned. Hope you enjoy! Love yall!

Scott's P.O.V.

My fingers moved across the keys of the piano, altering and adding notes down on my iPad. This song was coming out so fluently. I had only started it three hours ago and I had written the chorus and bridge already. We weren't supposed to be working today but this song had been bugging me all night. I promised myself I would take a break at lunch.

I was sat in the office of our house which was home to about ten different musical instruments that never got used. It was also where the kids did their homework and so it was full of papers and books and bags which had been left around when school had finished. It was a quiet room though which meant I could concentrate.

I was snapped out of my head when I heard the door crack open. I looked up to see Toby. He looked slightly confused about something, standing awkwardly in the doorway. He seemed to be waiting for permission to come in. "Can I help you, little one?" I asked, rolling my chair away from the piano. I rubbed my hand over my face to help my eyes focus and looked back up at him.

"I have a question." He said, walking forward. I nodded as he began to walk towards me. I lifted him up and sat him down on my knee, his blond hair flopping as he settled into place. "Y'know the other day when we were talking about Sarah?" He asked.

I smiled. "Yeah, what about it?" I asked, pushing his hair out of his eyes.

"Is it okay for me to like her?" He asked. I chuckled.

"Yes, of course. Why wouldn't it be?" I asked. He frowned and sighed, looking away. His hand moving up to press along the keys of the piano quietly.

"Because you and daddy are gay. Doesn't that mean I have to be gay too?" He asked. My eyes went wide. Woah, how the tables have turned! I shook my head as he looked at me again.

"You can be whoever you want to be! Whether you like girls or boys. Whether you are a boy or a girl or something in between. It doesn't matter! Your dad and I will love you no matter what!" I told him. He looked up at me, his large brown eyes wide.

"So it's okay that I like Sarah?" He asked again.

"Yeah! It's great that you like her! And it would be fine if you liked a different or a boy for that matter!" I stated. He nodded slightly.

"Can I ask you another question?" He asked. I chuckled at his curiosity, nodding. "Is it different for you to be gay?" He asked.

I frowned. "I'm not sure what you mean." I said.

"I mean, is it different that I have two daddy's and everyone else in my class as a mommy and a daddy?" He asked. I sighed, knowing that explaining this to a child was always difficult.

"It's different, yeah, but sometimes different is good. Different helps the world to evolve. But people who are gay are born gay. It's part of who they are. Some people don't like that. They think it's weird for two boys to fall in love or for two girls to fall in love. About ten years ago gay people couldn't get married in a lot of the states. They still can't get married in some parts of Africa!" I told him. His eyes went wide.

"Why do they think it's wrong?" He asked.

"They think it's unnatural. But it's a bit hard to explain. I don't fully understand it really. You'll understand better as you grow older." I told him. He nodded again.

"I'm adopted aren't I?" He asked. I nodded. "And Noah and Jessica are adopted too?" He asked. I nodded again. Where was he going with this? He thought for a while. "Does that mean my real mommy and daddy didn't want me?" He asked. I shook my head with not hesitation. I could see the tears building up in his eyes. I reached over the piano and pulled out a box of tissues, wiping his eyes carefully with one.

"No! It doesn't mean that they didn't want you! They weren't allowed to have you and it wouldn't of been safe for you and Noah to live with them." I told him.

"But what about Jess?" He asked, sniffling a little.

"Jess' mommy and daddy died when she was very little. Because Jess is from South Africa and they suffer from a lot of poverty. So we said we'd take her in and make sure she can live a great life instead of a sad one." I told him. I hated explaining things like this but it was better to tell him straight then to lie.

"Oh! I think I like it better living here with you and daddy. I don't think I would like living anywhere else." He said. I smiled.

"I like you living here too." I said, pulling him into my chest and wrapping my arms around him.

"I love you, daddy." He said, hugging me tightly. I felt my heart swell.

"I love you too, little one."

...

I dried my hair on the towel in my hands. My sweat pants hung low on my waist as I looked into the mirror. My eyes were suddenly drawn to my topless form and the scars that littered my arms. There had been no fresh ones for six years. And there were only new ones six years ago because of the death of my grandparents. It had hit me hard and I had cut myself once to see if it would take away the pain but it didn't and I stopped immediately.

I moved my hand up and down my forearm feeling the uneven bumps and grooves. I had wrecked them so much that my skin now resembled oatmeal. It was made up of only scar tissue, not part of my forearm had gone untouched. I scratched a little at the sensitive skin that had been wrecked by razors, glass, knives, anything I could get my hands on.

I sighed a little, remembering what it felt like. What it felt like to be so depressed that I wanted to kill myself. I would never have gotten the chance to marry Alex or have three amazing kids who I didn't go a day without feeling proud of. I would have seen the radio hits and the other Grammy wins.

I jumped when I felt a pair of arms move around my waist. I immediately relaxed when I saw that it was Alex. My heart thudded quickly. I could never get over how even after all this time it still felt like the first time we had kissed. My heart thudded fast. My hands began to sweat. My head was underwater.

"You're beautiful." He said, kissing my cheek. He took my wrist into his hand and slowly lifted my arm to his mouth. He kissed his way along every mark. I closed my eyes, feeling the skin under his gentle kisses flutter.

"I love you." I breathed, my eyes still closed. I felt the contact of his body move away.

"Keep your eyes closed." He whispered in my ear. His warm breath making me shudder.

The contact was only to be returned when he connected our lips. It caught me off guard to start with but I soon reciprocated. I would never get over how amazing his kisses were. Tender and soft. Slow and passionate. His hand on my cheek, making the skin tingle. All of my senses were heightened. I revelled in how he felt, how he tasted, how my body would feel like it was floating away. It was like I was on a cloud, slowly drifting away from reality.

The kiss was cut off by a doorbell. I opened my eyes to see Alex smiling, his eyes closed, his lips pursed slightly. "That will be the pizza." I whispered. Alex's eyes opened.

"Are you feeling okay? Everything's organised up there?" He asked me, pressing his forefinger to my temple.

"Yeah. Just thinking back on what it was like... I'm sorry..." I whispered.

"No need to be sorry! Tell me if it gets unorganised again. Then we can talk about it, yeah? I love you." He said. I smiled.

"I love you too." The doorbell ran again. I rolled my eyes. "Better get that." I said pecking his lips before walking to the hallway.

"Pizza party Friday night!" Alex cheered, racing out after me.