Ashling

Chapter 18

"You seemed stressed."

Cassandra was looking at him intently. They were sitting in Starbucks, on the same table at which they were sitting yesterday. Except that the place was empty. It was just the two of them, with their coffee cups in front on the table.

Tyler lazily stirred his coffee, not really wanting to answer.

She spoke again, "Tyler?"

"Hmm?" He looked up at her, and she gave him a warm smile.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" She asked him softly.

He shrugged, "There's nothing really to talk about."

She arched her eyebrow and he clenched his jaw. Who was he kidding? This girl sitting in front of him knew him better than anyone else, even though she didn't actually know him. She knew he was tensed, that something was on his mind.

Before he could say anything, she spoke, "Even though you were absorbed working on your phone, your face was radiating stress. And then when you were telling me about how you always wanted to be a lawyer, there was hesitation. There was some hindrance."

He looked back down at his coffee, not sure what to say. Everything that she had observed and deduced, had been right. She continued, "You have something that you hide, don't you? Something that you've buried deep inside; pushed to the back of your mind. But when you told me about how you felt regarding your job and why you chose it, all that was hidden, resurfaced. You remembered, even though you didn't want to."

He was trying his best to breathe normally, to keep control on his emotions and thoughts. No one in this world knew this secret about him. There was no one whom he ever felt he wanted to confide in. Even Sam didn't know the details, just bits and pieces. It was all coming back now; all those memories that he had sworn he would never think of.

He closed his eyes and licked his lips. He whispered, "I can't.."

He looked up at her and saw concern on her face. He swallowed and his lips quivered when he said, "I can't tell you.. Not yet.."

She smiled and covered his hand with hers. This was the fifth time she had held his hand, and every time felt like the first time. That gentle touch made him feel like combusting. It made him feel alive.

"I know," she began. "I'm not forcing you to tell me. I was just stating what you already know."

He took a shaky breath, stunned by the accuracy of her words.
"I want to tell you.." He breathed. He did, God knows how badly he wanted to share this with her. But he just didn't know when he should. All he knew was not now, not so soon.

She patted his hand and said, "All in good time."

Somehow, that made him relax. It made him feel like he was not alone in this, that there was someone who would offer him a shoulder when he needed one. And so he smiled in response.

She said, "Don't feel pressurized or scared, okay? There's nothing to be afraid of. I'm here for you. And I know you'll make it through."

He smiled gratefully at her, thankful for her presence, her warmth.

Then she finally said, "Wake up, Tyler. Wake up."