Can't Let You Go (Adommy)

Chapter 15

(A/N: I am so sorry. I didn't mean to leave you guys hanging for so long. I've been busy with school and I didn't have time to update. I'll try to add to the story as often as I can.)

TOMMY'S POV
When we got to the emergency room, I was forced to wait in the waiting area. I stood and paced back and forth for hours, tears quietly rolling down my cheeks. I couldn't help but imagine the worst. After all, it was my fault that this had happened. I caused my love so much pain that he wanted to kill himself.
How could I have been so self-centered? He's worth whatever my mother puts me through, especially since I'll only be with her for another year! Why the hell would I even think for a second that he wasn't worth it?! I'm the one who should f*cking be back there, not him. He didn't deserve this.
My thoughts were interrupted when I heard my name.
"Mr. Ratliff?" a female voice asked. I turned to face a young blonde doctor at the doorway into the waiting room.
"Yes?" I hated the way my voice cracked even with saying the simple word. I needed to do my best to be strong when Adam woke up. If he wakes up, I thought, but quickly dismissed. He has to wake up.
"Mr. Ratliff, come with me," the female said with a slight irritation in her voice. I guess she had called me several times before I heard her over my mental berating. I followed her into a small room at the end of the hall. I was terrified about what I might find.
Upon entering the room, I saw Adam laying in the hospital bed. He looked so peaceful, as if he were sleeping. At that moment, I really wished he was only asleep.
"How is he?" I asked the young woman.
"We're not entirely sure yet. He lost a lot of blood. We'll have to monitor him for the next few days and see how he is."
I took his hand in mine and cried, hoping that he would be okay and could maybe find a way to ever be with me again, even though I don't deserve it.
"Do you have any idea why he would attempt suicide?" she asked.
"It's my fault," I told her, my voice breaking. "I was a jerk to him, and I regret it more than anything."
"I'm terribly sorry," she said in an understanding tone. She took my silence as a cue to leave, and I was left alone with Adam.
"Please don't leave me," I told him quietly. "I know I was a jerk. But if you let me be with you, I promise to never hurt you again. I would do anything to see that gorgeous smile of yours just one more time."
I rubbed little circles into the back of his hand with my thumb, and as I laid my head on his chest, I stopped crying for the first time since I found him. I suddenly had a serene feeling that everything would be okay. And I hoped I was right.