Sinful

Chapter 7

"GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" Lana screams at me. "NOW!" She throws a little glass antique ash tray against the wall. "Take your stupid clothes take all your stuff and leave!" Lana screams at the top of her lungs.

"Will you fucking calm the fuck down?! I'm leaving!" I scream back at her. "WHY ARE YOU THROWING YOUR SHIT AT ME?!" I scream over her screaming voice yelling at me to leave. "WHY ARE YOU SKIPPING TO CONCLUSION WHEN I BARELY SAID ANYTHING YOU, YOU BITCH!" I scream at her.

"I DON'T NEED TO HEAR WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY! I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT! WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME A FUCKING BITCH UGH!" Lana's voice rings in my ears like she pierced through them. She throws another expensive looking vase against the wall. "GET OUT!" Her voice begins to crack from all of her screaming. "GO!"

"CALM DOWN! I AM!" I scream. My voice begins to crack, too. Usually when I have intense arguments with people, I start crying, but Lana is overreacting, I can't cry when she's acting like a total tool. I collect my clothing and scream a huff at her.

"WHO NEEDS YOU ANYWAY?" Lana screams at me. She sticks the middle finger at me and lets out a loud, "FUCK YOU!" I stick the middle finger back and scream it back at her. When I leave, I hear a sob escape Lana's mouth.

My foot is almost out the door until I have second thoughts about going back and comforting Lana. Instead I slam the door and run to my car pretending like I didn't hear anything. For a few minutes I've lost my breath; I feel like I've just run a marathon. My heart races, a queasy feeling erupts in my stomach. I keep debating whether I should go back in and apologize, but then I remember that she overreacted about the whole situation. Even though Lana was acting like a total bitch, I still love her. Something in my heart still tells me to go and comfort her.

I turn the ignition and drive back to my house in tears. I begin to sniffle now and then tears fill my eyes and cascade down my cheeks like a waterfall. My car is parked at my house but I stay in my car to cry. I feel my eyes becoming puffy and red and I gasp for air now. A part in my chest feels empty and I hold my hand against it. I am full on sobbing and hitting my head against the steering wheel repeating "I'm sorry, Lana" even though she won't hear me crying. "I can't believe I was stupid enough to mention the song to her right after sex. Why am I so stupid?" I cry out. "I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I'm so stupid."

My eyes grow tired and weak because of all my tears. I cry myself to sleep in my car. The last thing I see before my eyes shut is the sun shining in the afternoon sky.

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I wake up and the night sky has taken over the daylight. I find myself staring at the stars. I put the key back in the ignition and wipe off any left over tears on my face. My car says it's only 8:47p.m. which means that Lana must be awake for me to apologize.

I pull up in her driveway and rehearse what I'm going to say. "Lana I am sorry, look, um... uh... things just come out of my stupid mouth. We might've had a heated fight but I just kept thinking of going back and comforting you, please forgive me." I nod my head. "Okay that's good, I just have to stutter less," I say to myself as a quick note.

I step out of my car with a chilly feeling like I am doing the wrong thing, but why would I get this feeling when I know I'm doing the right thing. My eyes fix to her room's window that's light is turned on. Good, she's awake.

I carry myself to her door and notice it is opened. It's not breaking in if I know her, right? I walk in and creep my way up the stairs. Awkward noises are coming from her room. My steps are slower and slower going up each step. Her door is opened up by a crack. "Lana?" I ask opening the door. My heart drops and my lungs lose all of their air. A gasp escapes my mouth, Lana looks up at me and gasps as well. All of us stunned: Lana, me and the middle aged man laying naked underneath her.