Deception (Lesbian Story)

Chapter 32

AUBREY

It had been twenty days since I last saw Drew, since I last heard her voice. I was pissed and sad but mostly disappointed, but knew I had no right to be. She had a life like I do, not to mention that her life isn’t that simple, far different from mine and the fact that we have been together for months and had made love the night before she left did not change who we were. Still, in all honesty I was quite sad when she kissed me goodbye early Monday morning three weeks ago, I didn’t want her to leave but I couldn’t be selfish and even though I made her promise she would stay healthy, not overwork herself and return to me as soon as possible I knew that she would still overwork herself but my mind and most importantly my heart couldn’t accept the fact that she won’t answer any of my calls, never bothered to call me.

My friends knew something was wrong when I was sullen, moody and went about my studies and practices unenthusiastically but they couldn’t blame me, my girlfriend has as much as forgotten about me, I wasn’t sure if she did but she sure is making it hard for me not to believe it, I mean it wouldn’t hurt to answer my calls, call me or if she can’t it wouldn’t have hurt to send me a one word text just to let me know she’s still breathing.

The days passed slowly, painfully so. I tried to keep myself busy, but it was impossible. The girls tried to get me off of wandering about Drew but they failed miserably, so I was forced to spend a lot of time alone. And that was not good. When I was alone, I spent entirely too much time thinking about Drew, and that was not good, I’ll have to admit it to myself that I am insecure and everything about Drew is not helping me either, she attracted too much attention, especially to women and that gets me worried, if we’re going to talk about trust alone, I do trust her but trusting does not make everything go away. I hated worrying because worrying about Drew leads me to getting angry at her for completely ignoring me. How can she ignore me like that when I’m dying here missing her so badly and is in desperate need to hear her voice.

I screamed and I screamed and I screamed, after my third or fourth scream, I grabbed a pillow and screamed my lungs out against it.

“Is something wrong?” John barged in the room, worry palpable in his facial expression and body language.

“I miss her” I whined against the pillow, “Aubrey” he started giving me an emphatic look, “I know this is hard for you but you have to underst-“

“I DO!” I yelled cutting him off, “I understand but understanding doesn’t make the pain go away” I defended; I hugged the pillow against my body feeling miserable again. I’ve been staying here for a week now because I never had a good sleep since Drew left and the only solution I found effective was to sleep on Drew’s bed, my parents didn’t mind that I practically moved in at Drew’s house, Jace and John was sympathetic because I was so miserable they allowed me to stay here. When I first came in here last week, her room smelt like her, now it’s starting to smell like me and I didn’t like that one bit. I still don’t know how long Drew will be gone and the only thing that’s making me sleep is because it feels like she’s here when I can smell her scent, but now it’s slowly getting subtler and subtler.

I hadn’t notice when I started crying again, I’m pathetic and miserable. ‘Why won’t she contact me anyway?’

I swear if I find out that she’s been messing with a bitch wherever she is I don’t think I’d be able to stop myself from killing her. I cried harder thinking that there could be another woman in her arms, I swear I’m going to kill her. My sobbing was probably loud because John came in with a sympathetic look on his face, he sat beside me and I found myself hugging him for dear life. I cried, ranted and used every cuss word I could think of, and yes it was all directed to my girlfriend