Broken In Paradise (Perfect Promise Trilogy)

Chapter 12: Ally

It had most definitely been a long day. From the Laurmani fight that was hurting Camren, to the Larry drama, to all of the other pressures that come with being on tour, it was safe to say that I was pretty overwhelmed. All I wanted to do was curl up in my bed at home with my music and cry. I didn't want to deal with everything that I knew I would have to.

Dinah, Camila, and I decided to watch Frozen as Normani and Lauren worked out their issues. I tried to invest myself in the movie, but I just couldn't. Instead, I sat in Dinah's bunk, staring at the screen, letting my thoughts take over my mind. I did this until the movie was over, and retired to my bunk and waited until sleep took over my body.

When I awoke, the bus was filled with silence. I checked my phone to see that it was only six in the morning. I assumed that everyone else was asleep. I knew that I wouldn't be able to fall back asleep, so I decided to get out of my bunk and go make breakfast. I decided that I would make everybody pancakes to ease the tension. Everybody loved pancakes.

Once I made my way out of the bunks and into the common area, I found Meaghan sitting alone on the couch, staring off into space. Camila had told us when Meaghan wasn't around that the reason she was on tour with us was because Camila was scared for Meaghan's safety. She didn't go into too many details for the sake of her privacy. We had all been very accepting of this, but now I was really curious about it all.

"Meaghan, I'm making some breakfast, do you want some?" I asked kindly.

"No thanks, I already ate," she mumbled in her daze.

I looked over at the sink beside me. There were no dishes in there; no proof that she had actually eaten anything. When I had entered the kitchen, I didn't even see a plate out of place. Had she really eaten anything?

"I already cleaned everything up," she read my thoughts.

There was nothing left to say, so I let the girl go back to staring off into space. Maybe everything she had said was true. Maybe she had actually eaten and cleaned up after herself, a now she was just bored or thinking about something. I wanted to believe this, I really did. Although, my gut was telling me something completely different. I knew deep down that there was something seriously wrong happening with this picture.

Lauren walked into the general area of the bus. She looked exhausted; as if she hadn't even closed her eyes, let alone gotten rest. She almost looked worse than Meaghan, actually, and that was practically impossible. She walked up to me anyhow, and sat down on one of the benches and watched me get all of the ingredients I needed together. She watched me as if she was in a trance, but at the same time had something really important to discuss with me.

"Good morning," I smiled at her.

"What are we going to do about Harry and Louis?" Lauren went straight to the point.

"Why do we need to do anything?" I asked casually.

"What do you mean 'why do we need to do anything'? We need to do something because it's not right," she said.

"What's not right about it?"

My friend stayed quiet for a moment. That's the thing that I had realized, too. There was nothing wrong. Sure, maybe we didn't agree with the fact that they were keeping their relationship a secret, but there's nothing wrong with that. If I were dating someone of the same gender, I wouldn't keep it a secret, but that's the thing. I'm not them, and I can't decide what other people should do.

Also, I've come to realize that queer women are far more accepted in society than male queers, unless it's for the purpose of a "GBF." I don't understand why that is. I think that it has to do with the fact that if you're a gay man that diminishes your masculinity in a sort of way, whereas women supposedly don't have any masculinity anyways, therefore there's no loss and it's okay. Straight people, especially men, think that lesbians are "hot" and gay males are "wusses." It was no wonder to me now why Harry and Louis were keeping their relationship a secret.

"Thanks Ally," Lauren finally spoke.

"For what?" I asked.

"Making me realize that I shouldn't be worried about this," Lauren clarified.

"Anytime," I smiled in reply.

"I'll be back, I'm just going to go to the bathroom," Lauren said as she was already making her way towards the bathroom.

Normani appeared from her bunk as soon as Lauren closed the door to the bathroom. Normani rushed over to me frantically. She also looked like she hadn't gotten much sleep. I was beginning to wonder if anyone had actually slept or not.

"Is she gone?" Normani questioned me.

"Is who gone?" I felt bewildered.

"Lauren," Normani stated as if it was the most obvious thing ever.

"Oh, she's right behind me, but you didn't notice because I'm so tall that I can cover her entire body without being noticed with mine," I replied sarcastically.

"Don't be sarcastic, it's only funny when I use it," Normani flipped her hair dramatically.

"Sure," I laughed, "But why are you two avoiding each other? I thought you worked things out last night?"

"Here's what I wanted to talk to you about," Normani sighed, "Things were going well but I fucked it up."

"What did you?" I asked, concerned.

"I asked Lauren to ask me questions about anything and she did, and it was going alright, but it didn't really fix anything. Then Zayn came and asked us where Louis and Harry were, but we didn't know so he left and then we weren't talking anymore. So then I told her I had a question and she said to ask it and I did and then she got upset at me," she explained.

"What did you ask her?" I questioned.

"I asked her why she hated me so much," she mumbled, embarrassed.

"Mani," I sighed, "You can't just ask people that. Besides, she doesn't hate you. We both know that."

Before Normani could answer, Lauren reappeared from the bathroom. She looked just as tired as before, yet it seemed to be taking more of a toll on her now. She looked like she was going to fall asleep on the spot right then and there. She approached us anyway.

"Hey," Lauren greeted us.

"Hey," Normani could hardly make out.

"Ally, I'm really exhausted, so I'm going back to bed to try to get some sleep," Lauren said, "Can you let the others know, and come wake me up if there's anything?"

"Sure thing," I smiled, "Sweet dreams."

"If I'm asleep long enough to have any," Lauren chuckled as she headed back towards her bunk.

"Now what?" Normani sighed as soon as Lauren disappeared from view.

"Come and help me make breakfast for everyone," I replied.

It was surely going to be another long day.

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