Rejects // Luke Hemmings [au]

22

Song: Lithium - Nirvana
The High Road - Three Days Grace

January 1st, 1957

12:04 pm

The warm water runs down my back, causing the goosebumps that formed from standing in the cold bathroom to fade away. As usual, I'm the last to get in here, and the only one. There are a few women in this facility, but its about 80% men. I guess it's okay though, since I don't have to share the showers with that many people.

No matter where I am or what I'm doing, Luke is the only thing that I can think about. I thought I already had the maximum amount of feelings I could have for someone, but the other day in the art's closet, I realized that I like him a lot more than I thought I ever would. I care for Mikey, Ashton, and Calum, but with Luke it's different. I didn't plan for this to happen, but that night when he woke me up with the sound of his teeth chattering, then told me about what his perfect world would be, I couldn't help but look into those beautiful eyes. Blue has been my favourite color since.

I've known him for 19 days, and for 18 of them, I've had what I can call good days, without the fear of waking up the next. When I think about it, I don't think I've ever stayed sane this long, or even been this comfortable in this fucking prison. I think it's too soon to say I am happy, but with Luke here, I am about as close to it as I've ever been.

The feeling I get in my veins when he touches me is intoxicating. I've found a safe place when I'm with him, that I never felt in my life. It's beautiful how even just talking to him can make this terrible, disgusting world not seem so bad anymore, and that nothing really matters because I've got him.The feelings I have for him are the type that keep me up all night, and makes my head spin. Feeling his lips against mine makes me feel like the best fucking drugs in the world are pumping through my veins, and I think I may even be addicted. He's seen me at my lowest, in here, crying myself to sleep, but he's always there to pick me up and brush me off, telling me it'll be okay.

Although being with him is like euphoria, I am scared as hell because these feelings are stronger than I'll ever be. The worst part is that no matter how close we may feel, we're always going to be far away from each other. If we both stay here, it's always going to be the same fucking thing. We'll talk to each other every night and touch our feet together between the bars, but we'll never have the chance to wake up next to each other. I don't really mind though, as long as I get to see that beautiful smile everyday, nothing could ever be that bad.

Stepping out of the shower, I wrap the old towel around my body and walk to the sinks, where I brush my teeth and try my best to make my hair look presentable by combing through it with my fingers.

"Hey" Ashton smiles as I walk out of the bathroom, standing where Calum usually waits for me to bring me back.

"Hey Ashton" I give him a friendly smile and straighten out my ugly hospital clothes, noticing his expensive looking shirt.

"Come on, I'll walk you to the cafeteria for lunch" He tells me, but he catches my slight hesitation, "What's wrong?"

"It's just, Luke's going to be there" I let out a slight laugh.

"Who cares. I'm not going to let him keep me away from my girl" His hazel eyes shine. I smile and nod, walking next to him down the hallways until we reach the doors of the cafeteria. I spot Luke and Michael, and walk towards them, but Ashton follows behind. This can't be good.

"Hi guys" I say, sitting in my spot where they already have my tray set up for me. Ashton walks around to the other side and faces Luke, who is so tense you could feel it from a mile away.

"I hear you got what you deserved" Ashton speaks to Luke, talking about the therapy they put him through after the fight.

"I think you should leave him alone" Michael mumbles, scratching the back of his wrist with whats left of the nails they cut off because he would scratch himself too hard with.

"You're going to wish you never did that" Ashton tells Luke, "Are you listening to me, you piece of shit" He grabs the hood of Luke's hoodie and drags him to his feet, causing me to furrow my eyebrows. This is not going to end well.

Before I can say anything, Mikey stands up and grabs Ashton by the neck, throwing him against the floor. My heart races along with my thoughts as I watch the once innocent boy I know punch Ashton and spit something I can't make out into his face. It doesn't get very far before there are several guards holding Michael down and injecting him with something while he fights back, kicking and screaming to make it harder for them to keep a tight grip on him.

I notice my hands are covering my mouth and my eyes are wide as the whole cafeteria has gone silent when Michael finally falls under. Ashton doesn't look too hurt, but angry, so he walks out of the room, leaving Luke and I standing up while the guards carry out my friend.

I stand emotionless in the cafeteria, not moving a muscle in my body. I can hear Luke muttering my name, gripping my arm and trying to bring me back to reality, but it's no use. My eyes are fixated on the spot where Ashton hit the floor, and where Michael attacked him.

Michael just attacked the warden's son. I know that Ashton and Luke had a fight already, but this is different. Ashton won the fight against Luke, while Michael had Ashton pinned. I already know that this is going to be a punishment so severe, it'll make my bones ache to hear it.

I begin shaking, and I close my eyes tightly. I feel Luke's arms wrap around me, catching me before I fall back.

"No touching" I hear a guard say, trying to be a fucking asshole. I spit at him.

"Leave her be for one fucking second" Luke growls at him, "for christ's sake leave her be!"

I smile and bury my face into Luke's chest, feeling the familiar warmth and comfort as usual. I wish Michael had someone like Luke to make him feel okay. I suppose that person to him, is me.