Final ride

Fried Or Fertilized

She reached under the pillow and handed it to me, when I saw the contact name. I just wanna hear who the fuck is "her oxygen".

Trey: Hello who is this

Boy: who you and why you on my girl phone

Trey: Um excuse me im your girl father. Now who is this

Boy: dis me cuz who you

Trey: OH so now you live in California fool this Chicago so once again who is this

Boy: Wanna buy my mixtape

Trey: Mixtape nigga. Who are you

Boy: they running for about ten dollars but since you the one who busted a nut and made that fine girl. ill give it to you for five dollars.

Trey: You call my daughter again and im going kill you. No matter of fact you know who august alsina

Boy: Dat nigga crazy don't he throw chairs and shit

Trey: And hes throws bodies too

Boy: Ight well just do me a favor and just throw my mixtape his way, ight my name is Yung Humma

Trey: Ight yung hummy ima watch yo shit.

I hung up in his face and clicked on the youtube app on her phone. I typed in this little nigga name and pulled up his song fried or fertilized. Aint no way in hell this nigga is fifteen or sixteen so how the hell did she meet him. this nigga got a blue bandanna wrapped around his head and a cheap ass five dollar weave.

Trey: You got five seconds to explain to me why you got a nigga this old calling your phone. And why is he named your oxygen. You could breath before him and you breathing without his ass too. really Asia. This nigga look like he at least twenty three.

Asia: Um hes actually eighteen

Trey: You know just fucked up. you just fucked up

Asia: Can I just tell you how I met him though daddy hes really romantic

Trey: the nigga singing about how you like your eggs fried or fertilized and you telling me that he romantic

Asia: Daddy please

Trey: Okay how did you meet this r Kelly nigga

Asia: So one day I was at the basketball game and I was waiting on you to pick me up. so I was listening to music when I heard a honk. I looked up and I saw him and told me that my butt was fat. And I was like my butt and he was like yeah your butt

I sat there looking at her because I couldn't believe that my daughter fell for this lame ass nigga. I got up and walked over to the door and she jumped out the bed.

Asia: Um can I have my phone back

Trey: Oh why so you can talk to fried or fertilized. No you grounded

Asia: Grounded!

Trey: Yeah you grounded from phone , computer and especially eggs. Since you got niggas asking if you want them fried or fertilized. ( shakes his head)