Colors

XV : Blood Sausages

The dismissal bell rang. I stared at the figure that sat in front of me.

Four hours had passed,

Four hours and twelve minutes to be exact. But Jimin was still here with me.

I was still dumbstruck from his presence. There's this fear bothering me from inside all this time. The fear that this would turn out to be only a dream, the fear that I was only hallucinating, the fear that Jimin will once again disappear from my reach.

"Jinhee-yah, help me with our chemistry homework would you?" he turned back and faced me.

"Huh?" I broke out from my thoughts and tried grasping his words.

"I-I'm not good at chemistry though.." I continued.

"Me either. But together we have great chemistry," he said, grinning ear to ear.

I laughed at his sentence, he had just made me realize that I've missed him so much more than I thought.

"This babo."

I reached out my arm to poke his forehead. But then I stopped my hand midways.

I don't want to hurt him in any way.

He stared at my hand, which then awkwardly I pulled back. He was going to say something about it but I was faster and spoke first.

"My house?"

"Hmm.." he mumbled, "What about mine?"

I blinked my eyes. He rarely wanted me to come to his house, well except in the mornings. Even though he loved his mom and little brother, he used to hate being home.

"Jinhee?" He leaned forward, his face getting closer to mine.

"Y-yeah, sure." I flinched back.

We packed and left the classroom. Mobs of other students were also leaving the building. I unknowingly smiled when our feet stepped out the school grounds at the same time.

It has been two months huh, Park Jimin?

"If you don't want me calling you crazy, you should really stop staring at the ground and smiling without any reason at the same time."

I laughed and looked up. Spring was almost over and the day was warm. We walked through the same route we used to walk together on, side by side in a matching rhythm. Our hands brushed at each other's for a couple of times. Jimin tried making lame "knock knock" jokes and I laughed at his attempts. Everything felt so right, yet so wrong at the same time.

We finally reached his house. I stared at the front view of the building. I haven't been here since that day and haven't met Mrs. Park and his brother since his funeral. I inhaled the typical smell of his house the moment we stepped in. I realized that I also miss this house of his and his family. His brother suddenly appeared from the kitchen, carrying a bag of chips.

"Hyung, you're home!"

"Yeah Jisang, and I brought Jinhee ahjumma* along." he giggled and handed me a pair of house slippers.

I was going to smack him. But the moment I saw his smile, I held back my action. The smile of his that talks louder than his words, it reminded me of all the pain he had went through and how vulnerable he is. I just can't get myself to add up his pain.

"Hello noona!" Jisang approached us.

"Hey cutie," I ruffled his hair.

"I'm not a cutie! I'm on my 5th grade now," he stepped back and made me chuckle.