Melanie- The Full Moon (ON HOLD)

Frustration -Chapter 17 (Damien's POV)

How could this happen? Am I not suppose to mark my own mate? My wolf hasn't talked to me since we saw her lamp shattered. I heard it happen but then I didn't, you know? I was 100% focused on marking her, I didn't have time to acknowledge anything happening around me.

Last night, after I freaked out and Melanie had reassured me, we laid out her pillows and blankets she had on her window seat on the floor in the corner near her bathroom door, she insisted so we wouldn't be walking around each other and smashing limbs or have to go too far. I obliged, of course and we laid out candles, since I broke her lamp by mistake, so we can see each other better. It has a romantic feel yet so calm. I'm never going to let my wolf take over like that ever again and lose control if my actions could hurt my Em.

I haven't slept any better than I had last night. I held her close against me with a tight grip around her waist. She wrapped our legs together, her hands on my naked chest. I smiled at that. She wants to be close to me.

"You smell good." I chuckled and tuck my face in the crook of her neck, inhaling her scent. It's electrifying! Makes my body and mind respond to hers in more than one way.

"Yeah? What do I smell like?" Feeling playful as always when I'm around her, I nip at the angle of her jaw. She giggles and slaps my chest.

"Yeah, like.... Oranges and baking spices. It's a strange, unique combination but sweet and good all the same... kind of like you." My heart swelled. She rarely ever compliments me, but when she does, I'm the happiest man alive and I savoir them for as long as I can.

I move to kiss her all over her face, I couldn't help it. She's just too adorable and sweet, even when she's not trying to be. It should be illegal for any other man but me look at her perfection. Photoshop doesn't even exist next to her. She giggles again and pushes my face away, "I'll never compliment or state the truth about you if you're going to do that." I pout, "That's so not fair! I should be able to show affection to my mate!"

"Not if she says otherwise." I huffed and played with the draw strings on her dark green fuzzy shorts. It's hard not the get turned on and take her right now with her wearing these. So much leg is exposed....

But after that little mishap, it's enough to keep me at bay. Plus, we haven't talked about that yet. What if she's still a virgin and not ready? If so, I'd do the same, it's enough to keep me at bay. I won't force her. We have all the time in the world, maybe. Plus, we haven't even marked each other.... Which is another problem, why can't I?

Although she just found me and I her, we should be able to mark each other.... Wait... Could it be?

"Damien. Bro, snap out of it! Hey!" I'm brought back to reality by Kevin snapping his fingers in my face repeatedly. I roll my eyes and swat his hand away from my face.

"Damn, man. Is the meeting that boring? We're talking about the ceremony and what not. You should be excited and engrossed in this, I was."

That just makes me even more worried.

I shake my head, "No, its not that.... I'm just a little... Preoccupied at the moment." I twist the pen in my hands, making the ink refill popping in and out, repeated. Bouncing my right leg, I can't stop thinking about what happe- what could have happened. I'm a nervous wreck! Kevin must have noticed my weird state as he took in my jittery appearance. He looked both confused and worried. Probably cause I'm rarely ever upset or bothered about anything much. But this is a big deal. But if my assumptions are correct, then it wouldn't be much of a problem.

"Whoa, man. You okay there? You look sick." I shake my head, then all of a sudden there's a snap. I feel wetness on my hands. I look down at my hands to see ink and blood all over them. I drop the remaining of the pen, jump up from my chair and start pacing. I cant stand sitting for much longer. From the corner of my eye I could see Alpha Daren waving his hand in a shooing motion, dismissing the other pack members from the meeting that'd help set up the organization, decorations and theme for our ceremony. Of course I'd have Em pick out everything. They're just here to help and speed up the process. Kevin hands me a wet wash cloth, I wipe the blood and ink of my hands and thank him silently with a nod as I watch them heal back up, then go back to pacing again.

"Damien." I look up over at Alpha Daren, who's now standing by his chair, as well as Kevin.

"What seems to be bothering you?" I shake my head with a sigh and run my hands through my hair.

"We have to wait." They look at me in confusion, Kevin asks one of their many questions I'm sure they may have.

"Wait for what, Damien?" I sigh through my nose and slide down the wall, running my hands through my hair.

"It's Melanie." They wait for me to elaborate. I sigh, tightening my grip on my hair with both hands and continue. "I can't. I can't..... Last night....."

"That quick? You didn't get her pregnant did you?" I open my eyes to glare up at Kevin and growl, "No. We did not mate." He raises his hands in surrender. I sigh, again.

"All we did was make out a little. I got out of control and let Jameson, my wolf take over. We both focused on marking her..... Just as I was about ready to mark her..... Em screamed my name," I heard a sharp intake of breath from Kevin and slight realization cross his features. "There was desperation and fear in her voice. That's all it took for me to pull Jameson back again and register the sound of a shatter before she screamed.

"The window, walls and ceilings were covered in ice. It spread around her room as I watched. I was both astonished and scared shitless. I could have froze her to death. She would have gotten hurt because I was so careless. Not to mention the dangers we'd both be in if we're not marked. And right after I've just found her......" I turn and punch the wall as the fear and anger all come back.

"Damien. Calm yourself." Alpha Daren orders me and I obey. I lay my forehead on the wall and close my eyes, taking in deep breaths. A silent tear finds its way out. This is too much. After I've calmed down Kevin breaks the silence.

"I felt it.... Her fear. She's somehow blocked me from her thoughts but I could still feel her emotions, for our bond won't allow our emotions to be blocked from one another, or anything but our thoughts for that matter. It was so strong... I worried about her a while, until I came to the conclusion that she was with you, she was fine." That just saddened me even more, cause I've already proven that I can't be trusted to keep her safe. My own mate!

I haven't seen her yet this morning and even though Jameson hasn't spoken to me since the incident, I could feel he's getting a little restless too.

I had to wake up earlier than usual for the meeting since everyone else is busy during and after school. I didn't want to leave her. She's so warm and comfortable, it was hard. She even said she's falling for me.... That moment I wasn't sure of how to deal with anything. Now I think about it, I'm already in love with her. Maybe not as deep but it'll get there. Every little thing about her that I do and don't know. I love it. I love her.

"Where is she? I need to see her." I whisper. I glance over at Kevin and see his eyes are glazed over. I'd have to admit that I'm jealous he can see through her eyes and feel her any time he wants, when I can't. Ever, probably.

"She just finished breakfast. And is on her way to the library, up on the third floor, waiting for you." I pull my hand out of the wall, not caring about the blood, cuts, and white dust on my hand. I stand and practically speed walk to the door.

"Damien, we can forbear the ceremony. Until she can be marked, unharmed. You as well." I push the sadness away from the thought of me hurting her just from nearly marking her. What I am supposed to be doing, it's a man's second nature to mark their mate. I nod my head, that's what we need, time. And leave to the library to find my mate, telling myself that's one thing that will keep me from punching another wall until I get to her. Time. We have time. Maybe now just isn't the right time.