Unwanted

Chapter 33

I sighed, running my hands through my hair as I stared at the box. A week has passed since we completed the mating bond and I was nervous. What if I am pregnant? I know Hades won't be upset, we've already discussed it. I was just afraid of becoming a mother when I'm only eighteen, turning nineteen in five days. I bit my lip and walked into the bathroom, needing to get through my nerves.

I felt a little disappointed when I stared at the negative sign, but also a little relieved. If I was pregnant then I would have been fine with it, just super nervous. I threw the stuff away before seeking out Hades, knowing exactly where he was.

I shoved the door open to our room and laughed a bit, "Still using the bed rest excuse?" I chirped.

He looked up and smiled, "Not really, I just can't focus on my duties right now."

"Why?"

He shrugged, "Someone saw him today."

"Who?" I asked, sliding next to him.

He brought me to his chest and kissed my head, running his fingers through my hair. "My father's Beta."

I could hear the fear in his voice, his body was slightly shaking from it as well. I looked up at him, my heart breaking at his wide and terrified eyes. I gently cupped his face and kissed him on the lips, knowing this usually calms him down. We made out for a few minutes before parting and just gazing at each other.

"Well, if he returns...I'll be beside you the whole time." I whispered, kissing him again.

He smiled softly and stared at me, awe and love evident on his face. "How did I get so lucky?" he murmured.

I laughed, "Well, that's something you ask the Moon Goddess."

He nuzzled his face into my neck, hiding it from view. "Mmhmm." he hummed.

I smiled, combing my fingers through his soft hair as I stared at the wall. My thoughts drifted off to the pregnancy test and that same sorrow filled me. I turned in his arms and looked at him, he instantly saw the pain in my eyes and frowned.

"Are you okay?"
I sighed, "I'm not pregnant."
It was silent for a few moments before he muttered out an "Oh."

We sat there in silence, thinking over this news. I was upset, but then relieved. It's all so confusing and I just keep on confusing myself more.
"Celina, we can't keep thinking about it. We didn't lose a baby or anything, we just never got pregnant. I know, it's sad that we didn't, but we both know we're not ready. Neither is Hades. We should fix him first." My wolf voiced.
I sighed, "I know, figuring out how to fix him is one hell of a task."
"Exactly, I know he'll be a great father. He has amazing role models as a young boy, but right now his mind is a mess. Not only that, but what's going to happen when he's no longer broken? You've been so busy with fixing him, finding out his problems, and so on that you forgot about the abusive years. What are you going to do if he gets angry again? Are you going to flinch? Run?"

I frowned, she's right. Hades hasn't really gotten angry for the past few weeks and never acted as if he's going to hit me. I wasn't concerned about myself but more worried for Hades. I know usually victims of abuse are afraid of getting hit again, but I've worked past that point. Now that I know I can fight back, I'm as worried anymore. The only problem is, I am afraid of him getting angry and lashing out at me. He's done it before, my father has done it, what's stopping him from doing it again?
I shook the thoughts from my head, I have to fix him and not myself. I'm fine.
Hades suddenly grabbed me and pulled me close, softly kissing my head.
"Are you okay?" He asked.
I nodded quietly, "Yeah, I'm fine."

A/N: I know, suckish chapter 😕 I'll probably change it in the future.