Becoming Her (Trans)

Chapter 15

The first thing I notice when I walk in Josh's house is the assortment of make-up on the coffee table. I find it odd; Josh's mom always kept her things in neat little piles in neat little places, and Mandy left at least the day after Kelly and I visited. Usually when Mandy's gone, she's gone for months at a time.

So, let's say I was in for a surprise when Mandy was in the kitchen, humming a Beyonce song as she stirs something in a mixing bowl. Instead of her usual fabulous outfits, Mandy donned on a ratty apron over sweats. She's not aware of the surrounding; she's moving herself around in lazy circles. 

Suddenly, there's a loud rumble upstairs. "Heyo!" Josh roars, jumping down and stomping on the ground level. "I smell something good!" He turns to see me. "Oh, hey. What's up, Matthew?"

Mandy doesn't seemed to be surprised about Josh's antics. She calmly puts down the bowl and gets out a cookie sheet. "If you touch these without my permission, I'll fuck you up," she says in a casual tone. Also noticing my appearance, she waggles her finger at me. "That goes for you, too. I don't care if the cookies are the only reason you came by."

I shake my head. "I didn't even know you're still here," I say. As Mandy's rolling bits of cookie dough, Josh flops on the couch and turns on the TV. I practically have to shout my question over the Seahawks game: "What's the occasion?" 

"Joshua Maxwell, turn the fucking volume down!" Mandy booms. My best friend grumbles, but complies. As soon as the television is quiet enough for us to converse, she answers my question. "There's been a couple of problems back in New York, and Mom called me in tears asking me to come back here for a bit. Apparently, she thinks there's something wrong with Josh, and figures I can help get him back on his feet."

"TOUCHDOWN!" Josh pumps his fist in the air. 

Mandy rolls her eyes. "I find it surprising she's finding out about it after 16 years," she states. The oven beeps, but she ignores it. "As far as I'm concerned, there's always been something wrong about Josh."

"That's so not true!" my best friend intervenes. "You're jealous because I'm awesomer than you." Something goes wrong on TV, and he curses.

" . . . Anyway, so with what's going on in New York and what Mom's been worrying about, I figured it'd be better if I stay here for the time being." She places the full sheet in the oven. After setting the timer, Mandy gets out another sheet and starts filling it up. Without asking, I place my phone on the island for safekeeping, and go to the kitchen sink to wash my hands before picking up a huge amount of dough.

"You went to Fife High School, right?" I start. I'm not in the mood to make cookies in silence. 

Mandy nods. "Worst three years of my fucking life," she responds. "There were too many two-faced bitches for me to handle. By the time my senior year started, I was getting straight As because I was deep in the schoolwork to get away from them." She angrily smashes a ball. When Mandy realizes what she's just did, she rolls it again. She carefully puts it at the end of the first row.

"Why did you ask?" she continues as if nothing happened.

"I couldn't remember if you did," I lie. To make sure Mandy doesn't say anything else, I keep myself busy with filling the rest of the sheet and replacing the one in of the oven when it's time.  

When I turn around to place the baked goods on the island, I notice Mandy giving me a look. I try my best to ignore it by taking out a spatula to remove the finished product. Finally, she can't stand the awkward silence, with the exception of Josh's football game. "Has something been bothering you at school lately?" she asks. Mandy leans against the island. 

I start to shake my head no, then think again. "How bad was it?" 

"What does that mean?"

Before I get a chance to answer her, I inadvertently slide the still-hot sheet towards my arm. I yelp in pain as they make contact. I make my way to move the long shirt sleeve up, but stop at the wrist when I remember the cuts. Instead, I leave it there and get out an ice pack from the freezer. 

"Well," I say, still wincing in pain. "Besides the extra effort in the academics, have you, uh, done anything illegal?"

"Ah." A knowing smile appears on Mandy's face. She lowers her voice so Josh can't hear her. "Let's just say at that age, I was learning to tell the difference between a good and bad acid trip."

"Is that all you did?" 

She snorts. "Hell no. That was just the beginning." I'd ask for the specifics, but I'll admit I'm a little afraid of what she might tell me. 

"Now, since you have been a good little helper, I'll let you have a cookie," Mandy says, completely changing the subject. 

"Can I have some?" Josh shouts from the living room.

"Like hell you can!" Mandy answers. "You've been sitting your ass on that couch while Matthew was helping." More grumbles come from my best friend, but that seems to be it from him. I snicker to myself as I take a goodie from the plate. 

Mandy watches me warily as I bite into it. It's been so long since Mom made cookies, so I'm not really surprised to think this is the best homemade cookie I've ever had. While I'm resisting the urge to mumble, "My precious," I finish it up and use my shirt to wipe off the crumbs on my hands. Mandy hasn't broken eye contact the whole time.

"Did I suddenly become part of a reality TV show?" I quip.

She laughs. "Please. 'Keeping Up with the Kardashians' was a better show than this." I gasp and try to smack her with a towel nearby. Mandy giggles again while she runs from me. 

"You're so gonna getting it!" I declare. I chase her out of the kitchen, around the living room, and up the stairs. Mandy tries to lock herself in the bathroom, but I know for a fact there's no lock. Instead, she rushes out of it and goes to her room, me still trailing behind. I block her door from closing completely.

"Matthew!" Mandy shrieks. Last time I checked, she has a fear of being chased. I guess it's still true, judging from the wide-eyed look on her. 

I growl. "I'm going to get you!" I barge into her room, and try to get to her. Unfortunately, I trip and fall onto her bed. "Ack!" I muffle through the blanket. I try to get up, but fall back down. "Um, I totally meant to do that."

Mandy starts laughing, forgetting about the chase for a second. "Sure you did, Matthew," she says. She walks over and helps get me up. I thank God she was using my non cut up arm to drag me up. "If you do that every time you chase me, I might be able to get over the fear." She give me a half-smile. I chuckle out of politeness. 

"Are you guys done acting like little kids?" Josh calls out. 

"Excuse me? We're acting like little kids?" his sister asks. "I'm not the one who's throwing enough tantrums to make Mom think there's something wrong with you."

"Ha! I knew you've never thought I had a problem before!"

I can see Mandy rolling her eyes. "As if!"

Josh ignores her. "Yo, Matthew! Get your ass down here!" 

"Why?" I ask. 

My best friend clomps up the stairs. He holds out his hand for me to see my phone is in a middle of a call. I pale when I see the number. In an annoyed tone, Josh answers, "Gwen's called you. She wants to know if you're free on Sunday night."