Social Suicide

Troubles

Today was April's birthday. I was super excited because I had planned to take her our to see a movie and go eat dinner-- curtesy of me. April wasn't a fan of big parties and she really didn't like acknowledging her birthday.

I got out of bed and walked to the lounge room where mum was sitting on the couch, crying.

"Hey what's the matter?" I asked walking over to sit beside her. I wrapped my right arm around her shoulders and let her cry into my white pj shirt.

I couldn't think of any possible reasons as to why my mum would be crying at eight thirty in the morning. I thought for a while, coming up blank.

"Rob..." She finally looked up at me with wide, red-rimmed eyes.

"What is it?" I asked, my arm still on her shoulder.

"Someone's taken all our money... We're bankrupt Rob." The words barely left her mouth before she started crying again. 

"It's okay mum, we'll work up the money again. We've still got the money i've made from my job, don't worry." I pulled my mum back into my arms, where she sobbed for what seemed like forever.There was nothing worse than seeing my mother cry, it pained me. Especially when she was crying so much and for so long.

"That's the thing Rob... You've been bankrupt too." The words barely left her mouth and i flinched, as if i had been slapped in the face and she continued to weep into my shirt.

I wanted to punch something, to scream and shout and just put the person who did this to us in so much pain and despair, but i had to stay strong for mum. 

"It's okay," I said stroking her hair, "we'll get through this." I didn't even believe the lies as they came out of my mouth.

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April called me around mid-afternoon. I had completely forgot it was her birthday.

"What, so no call for the birthday girl?" She asked smugly.

I didn't reply. I couldn't ruin her birthday.

"Jeez, someone's a little moody." She laughed on the other end of the phone, "is it that time of the month already?" 

Her laugh was like music to my ears and she knew very well that it made me smile when i was upset. It didn't work today.

"Anyway, the cheer girls are taking me out tonight, i just thought i'd let you know..." She said awkwardly.

"Oh." 

"What's wrong?" She asked. That was the thing about having close friends-- they could even tell something was wrong over the freaking phone. 

"Nothing." I lied.

"Rob. Tell me." She said sternly. 

"I was going to take you out to a movie and dinner... but you've got plans so i can't. I'm just pissed off is all." It wasn't a lie-- i was upset about the fact i couldn't take her out... i just couldn't tell her why i was actually pissed off. 

"Aw, Rob that's so sweet! I can cancel if you want?" 

"No, no. You go have fun with your friends. It's okay..." I replied glumly.

"Even if i do go, i'm not going to have fun." She replied, trying to convince me to take her out. I wished it were as easy as telling her to be ready by five.

"April, go. You deserve to have a good time. It'll just be boring if you go out with me."

"If you say so." I could just imagine her pursing her lips, making them form into a straight line.

"I didn't mean to piss you off. I'm sorry."

I looked at my phone, to see if she had hung up because there was silence on the other end.

"Happy birthday!" I squeezed in right before she hung up. 

Just when things were going really well in life, everything seemed to come crashing down on itself. It was almost as if someone was laughing at me. 

If only i could live a good life. One side of me thought.

Ha, no such thing as wishful thinking. The rational side thought.

April

I tried not to let the phone call with Rob distract me. Not only was he practically asking me on a date but, there was the part of me that wanted him to ask me out. I shouldered the thought and commenced getting ready for 'the big night ahead'. Knowing the cheer girls, it'd be something too extravagant. 

I applied my hot pink lipstick before giving myself a once over in the mirror. Tonight i had my hair trailing down my back in loose curls, the shade of it off-setting my bright pink sixties-style short, skater dress. I slid into my black pumps and grabbed my purse before leaving the room.

"Aw, look at you honey! You're like a younger version of me. So beautiful." That would be my mum. She was very modest and she said this as i retreated down the stairs.

I suppressed an eye-roll at her modesty and just smiled.

"If only you could become a model or a singer. You really are wasting your time with your studies. Wouldn't you rather fame and fortune over pain and struggle?" She drilled.

"Mum. It's my birthday. Can't you just let it go for today?" I asked.

"I just don't see the point in you doing all this study to get a low-paying, minimum- wage job."

"I can get a good job if i wanted to. And i can make more money than you. Normal people work their way to get something they want, not marry some director to land leads in movies. You took the easy route... Smart people can be famous too." And with that, i sauntered off. 

ROB

I spent the night of April's birthday working. I had asked to extend my hours which would mean i'd get extra pay. Jenifer also agreed to pay me in cash when she heard about what had happened. Luckily it was the end of the month and i'd be getting paid pretty soon. 

It was 11pm when i started heading home. It was dark and the salon finally closed. As i walked toward my house, i heard blaring music and people have fun off in the distance. It seemed to be coming from Candy's house and it sounded like most of the school was at this party.

I shrugged off the fact i hadn't even gotten and invite and continued the uneventful walk home.

I locked myself in my room and had a shower before slipping into my warm bed and shutting my eyes. It was harder getting to bed than i thought. For one, i had a fight with April on her birthday and i was bankrupt. How i'd survive this next week until my pay, i didn't know.

I quickly logged onto Facebook on my phone and checked April's wall. She was one of my three friends (my mum and my aunt were the other two) and saw that people had posted on her wall. I read some of the posts:

"Happy birthday you party animal!"

"Hope you liked the surprise party."

"Looking fine tonight girl!"

"I'm so happy you didn't bring that freak with you." 

I knew the girl who posted that was referring to me. It hurt me a lot-- i admit-- but what hurt me more was the picture that came afterwards. 

April was locking lips with some shirtless guy and the description read: "Forgetting about those who've hurt me today and just having a good time." 

April was talking about how i had pissed her off. What pained me the most was that she was the girl who was keeping me from going insane yet, i might have just lost her as a friend. 

I went to comment on the photo, "I'm sorry... You don't know how much you mean to me," before deleting it, locking my phone and shutting my eyes. 

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