Winged Dreams

Chapter 5: When Losing Hope Is A Choice You Make

6th October, 2015

"Indeed, no one despairs of relief from Allah except the disbelieving people."

(Surah Yusuf 12:87)

Chapter 5:

When Losing Hope Is A Choice You Make

"What about Bilal?" Dina finally asked, finding it odd to even say his name out loud.

She wasn't expecting Rashida to ask this question, she didn't even know him. Dina almost felt she was in trouble by the way her mother was behaving, but no matter how much she ransacked her brain to find the cause for such a hostile look, she ended up with none.

"Who is Bilal, Dina?" She repeated the question as she entered the house, and Dina followed behind her.

"He is Naila's brother."

"Who is Naila?"

"The girl who is a volunteer at the Islamic Academy I visit occasionally."

"How do you know her brother?"

"I don't."

"Don't lie to me."

Dina blew a breath of frustration, and resisted the urge to stomp to her room and bang her door shut to convey her annoyance. Those days of being a brat had long gone and Dina was considered quite a level headed person by every person who saw her.

"Can you please tell me what is going on? I really have no idea."

"Oh you don't?" Rashida asked sarcastically, her tone laced with anger.

Dina sat on the couch, unpinning her hijab and rubbing her face with the other hand.

She looked up, and as sincerely as she could, said, "I have no idea."

Knowing that Dina wasn't the kind to spin stories, especially not with her, Rashida's furious expression softened, just a little bit, before she was back to her hostile self.

"Then care to explain why I got a call an hour back from a woman named Shabana and she told me that she was interested in you for her son Bilal?"

Listening to those words, Dina looked at Rashida with wide eyes and without realizing, the hijab pin in her hand grazed her skin and her index finger started bleeding. She sucked in a breath, ignoring the pain the prick caused and pressed her finger on the hijab and saw as the yellow scarf soaked the red drop of blood.

Paying no heed to her finger after that, she tried taking in what Rashida had just said.

Bilal's mom had sent a proposal for her?

For HER?

How? When? Why...

"I don't understand," Dina said shaking her head. As surprised as she was, there was a certain foreign emotion that she experienced as her mother said that.

No matter how unexpected and unfathomable this news was, maybe the emotion she experienced was indicative of the fact that this is what she wanted.

"You only know Naila through the Academy and you aren't involved with her brother or you two are seeing each other?"

"Mom!" She retorted. "Astagfirullah."

Yes, Dina was not the best of Muslims, but she knew that this guy business was haraam. Dating was out of the option and she felt so sick that Rashida did not even know she wasn't into all this.

Finally, and thank God, finally, it looked like Rashida believed that Dina wasn't voluntarily involved in the phone call she had just received.

"So, you didn't know about this, right?"