Winged Dreams

Chapter 12: Dreams of A Refugee

29th October, 2015

AN: The long paragraph you will read ahead, in Isra's words, is taken from the refugee series of HONY's Facebook page and is a true story. The context of it is altered to fit in Winged Dreams, but that one paragraph that's italicized is the exact words of a refugee. May Allah grant us victory over the disbelieving folk and free the oppressed!

حَسْبُنَا اللَّهُ وَنِعْمَ الْوَكِيلُ"Hasbunallahu wa ni'mal Wakil'

Allah (Alone) is Sufficient for us, and He is the Best Disposer of affairs (for us)."

Surah Al 'Imran (3:173)

Chapter 12:

Dreams of A Refugee

She was a mixture of dreams and reality. So simple and yet so intricate. So plain yet so beautiful. Her eyes held every hidden secret but her smile made you wonder if this was the same girl who found herself lost. She exuded strength; she was a picture of bravery. She was the flower which had gotten itself scarred in the sandstorm, but the very scar was the reminder that she had witnessed and survived the tough times.

As Dina gazed at the moving clouds, lying flat on the ground with her bag under her head, she felt so tiny in the universe. After all the children had gone, instead of going home, Dina had escaped to the depths of the lush garden in the interiors of the hospital. Humongous trees surrounded her, and as she observed the birds in the vast sky, the patterns of clouds and the rhythm of breeze kept her company.

In the silence of nature, she felt calm, but as she thought back to her life, she was filled with mixed emotions. A heavy sigh escaped her lips when her mind drifted to Tabrez. Their last encounter kept flashing before her eyes and she had to tear her gaze away from the humming bird on the tree to redirect her thoughts. In an attempt to forget that, she was reminded of Bilal, but this time, due to a reason unknown to her, it hurt even more to think about him.

Although she was already certain of her decision the minute Khalid brought forward the proposal, due to the insistence of Simran and Tabasum, she had offered her Istikhaara Salah. It was the first time in life she had offered this prayer, and as informed by her friends, it was to seek the counsel of Allah. They had told her that after performing this prayer, whatever direction her life would follow, and any decision she'd take, in sha Allah, it would be by Allah's will. Opposed to what they said, Dina hadn't got any feeling. However, since she did tell her dad yesterday that she wasn't interested in marriage, perhaps this was the will of Allah.

Even as she informed Khalid of her decision, saying it out loud did not seem right. And perhaps it was because a piece of her rational mind knew that her heart wanted something else. It was aware that a tiniest bit of her wanted to take the plunge and get married to Bilal, but that spark in heart, in need of love, couldn't survive the barriers Dina had built and it was extinguished the minute she uttered those words.

I don't want to marry Tabrez, dad. And I don't want to marry anyone else too.

Somehow, the word Bilal seemed too heavy on her tongue, and she had resorted to generalizing his name to anyone.

So here she was, under the open sky, with woods as her companions. Subconsciously, she plucked the grass beside her and did not even realize as both her hands shredded it into bits, perhaps her inner self finding a way to release the pent up emotions.

At the sound of footsteps in the serene atmosphere, Dina abruptly sat up. Her gaze searched her surroundings until she finally saw a figure approach the trees. Silently, Dina observed as the canteen lady, who Dina took as a smiling friend, for they'd both exchange smiles every time they spotted each other, sat down on the grass floor and opened her lunch box. Since the lady hadn't observed Dina yet, she decided to remain silent as well and continue from where she left the journey of her thoughts.