Soulmates | Phan AU |

Twenty Eight; Together

I've already wrote the last chapter omg I am so sad. 

Chapter Twenty Eight; Together

Dan:

"Are you ready?" 

"As I'll ever be." 

"It feels as though we've just got here and we are already going back." I sighed, picking up my backpack. Me and Phil had decided to go back and see our families. Well we were meeting each other halfway, we were meeting them in an old cafe at the edge of the town that hardly anyone ever goes in. I am surprised it's still in business to be honest. In hindsight, the quaintness of the cafe is probably what attracted the small amount of customers that it did. 

Phil hummed, agreeing with me. "Yeah but we owe it them. I am sure they are going out of their minds - I know I would be. They deserve an explanation from us, face to face. We owe them that much." 

Phil was right. We did owe it to our parents but that didn't mean that I was in full support of his idea. The thought of seeing my mother again was comforting to me but there was still that sense of overwhelming anxiety surrounding the idea of leaving our safety; our home. Maybe I was being paranoid or maybe I was being realistic but I didn't want anything bad to happen. 

My main concern was that someone would see us leaving the forest and find out about the cabin and rat us out. I worried about Phil. I worried about us. I worried about everything and I hated and hated and hated it. My thoughts were overpowering and my breathing had become shallow and I could feel Phil's worried gaze on me. We hadn't even stepped outside the cabin yet and I was already freaking out. 

The air felt thick, and my knees were weak. I backed up as far as I could until my back had reached a wall to which, upon meeting with my back, I slid down it. I could feel the tears rolling down my cheeks and dripping down from my chin onto my black t-shirt, leaving small stains. My hands shook and my shirt began to feel too tight, as if it was choking me. However, I knew this wasn't the case, it was a size too big for me. 

It wasn't until I felt arms wrap around me that I started to calm down. The warm feeling surrounding me and the sound of Phil's heart beat was so soothing. The gentle thud of his heart was what I used as a guide to regulate my breathing. 

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. 

I repeated this inside my head like a mantra. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale. Soon enough my breathing was back to normal and my thoughts had ceased a little bit. I felt so much calmer now yet the splitting headache still remained. 

"Dan, babe, are you alright?" Phil asked me quietly. He still held me in his arms and I was grateful. I was grateful I had someone like him that would hold me in times of need and not leave me to it when I had my panic attacks. I always felt drained after them and I still had that lingering feeling of being trapped and on the verge of death and I was glad that Phil would treat me so carefully, he was so cautious with me afterwards and I appreciated that. 

Slowly, I nodded. I was a little unsure of what I was feeling but I felt better than before, that was for sure. 

"Yeah- yeah, I am fine." Clearing my throat a little, I reassure him once again about my current state. "I'm a little worn out but I am fine. I feel a little stupid though." 

"Why's that?" 

I shrugged. "Why I had a panic attack in the first place, I suppose. The reason, I mean. It was ridiculous." 

From behind me, Phil sighed. His hand was comfortingly running through my hair, whilst his other hand was wrapped around my waist and holding me close to him. "Don't ever, ever disregard your reason for having a panic attack. It's not healthy. You have every right to be scared! I am scared too but we can do this together, okay? Together we will face our fears, together we will get through this and together we will come out on top." 

"Together?" 

"Together." 

X

it's 6 am I am sorry if this is really bad. 

we are nearing the end and i am sad (and hungry). I honestly don't want this to end, I have enjoyed writing this story so much ugh. why must things end?