Jack barely takes two steps into my room before locking his strong arms around my tiny torso, holding me tightly.
“Thank god you're here” I mumble burying my face into his blue t-shirt. As his left arm stays wrapped around my lower back and his right runs up and down my upper I feel all the anger and tension beginning to dissipate from my body.
Jack doesn’t say a single word as I just stand there, my arms wrapped around his torso, eyes closed, and inhaling his scent; trying my hardest to stay calm and not suddenly break down or freak out. Sensing this Jack pulls away, using one hand he lifts my chin up so I am looking at him. He silently mouths the word smile at me and I can’t help but oblige.
*
“So now that you’re calm, can you tell me what’s wrong?” Jack asks sitting across from me on the bed. He reaches over and brushes away a stray curl that fell out of my messy bun and onto my face away.
“I just- I just. I don’t know what-” Closing my eyes I blow air out of my nose, trying to find out the correct way to say this. My brain short circuits; all the words in the English language fly out of my head leaving me with only incomprehensible noises falling out of my mouth.
“Laci-Rae form sentences!” Putting one hand on each of my shoulders he stares straight into my hazel eyes with his blue grey ones.
I quickly close my eyes and once again blow air heavily out my nose. Jack’s hands break their contact with my shoulders; the bed quietly creaks as he crawls over to be sitting next to me. Resting my head on his shoulder I slowly open my eyes, an exasperated sigh leaving my slightly parted lips.
“I just can’t believe this happened after everything Tom and I have been through.”
“What happened?” I sense him staring at my neck. His eyes constantly glancing at the few small fading purple marks along with the large prominent one that had found a home on neck since that start of this little trip. “You’re not p-”
“Don’t you dare say that.” I quickly remove myself off of Jack, instantly sitting upright. “You couldn’t seriously think I’m stupid enough to be the girl who got knocked up at seventeen and then again at eighteen! You’re supposed to be one of my best friends Jack, how the fuck could you even think that!” I reach behind me grabbing a pillow and clutch it tightly in my hands before chucking it angrily at his stupid face. Luckily for him, he catches it right before its about to nail him directly in the face.
“I didn’t say that Laci-Rae.” He sets the pillow down in between us.
“Yeah because I stopped you from saying it!” Unbelievably consumed with anger, I feel my hands clenching into fists next to me.
“Laci-Rae” He tries to pull me into a hug.
“Don’t touch me” I growl under my breath as I push him away.
“Laci-Rae please!”
“Laci-Rae please what? How could you even say that?” A thoroughly offended tone takes over. “Get out of my room, I don’t want you here anymore!
“Hey! Hey! Hey! Please don’t get mad at me, I was just say-”
“I thought you didn’t say anything”I raise an eyebrow. “But what, you wouldn’t be surprised if I was?” I purse my lips at the end of the sentence
“My god Laci-Rae, of course not? Just the circumstances of everything could point to that.” He places a hand on my shoulder. “Laci-Rae you called me beyond frazzled that you couldn’t hang out with Tom or you would ruin everything for him. You and Tom have been back together for a while now and I mean it’s pretty obvious that you two are...”
“We are not!” I throw his hand off my shoulder.
A slight chuckle passes through Jack’s thin lips. “The marks on your neck tell a different story.” His eyes once again linger towards the marks on my neck. “Plus there was that night when we set up our rooms in the village.
“Jack Laugher stop pretending like you know anything about my relationship! We haven’t done anything since we’ve been back together!” I snap at him so overcome with anger. Anger quickly turns to guilt: I’ve never snapped like that at Jack before, but I just couldn’t help it. “Things have come close but I stop it or other people have caused it to. We probably would have tonight, but- but” My words suddenly become choked up. I curl my knees into my chest, hugging them tightly as I slowly begin to rock back and forth.
“But what Laci? If you’re not pregnant, then what is wrong?” He rests a hand on my mid back.
Silence settles in the air around us. How could I even express what was wrong? Everything was wrong- sitting here crying was wrong, being with Jack tonight instead of Tom was wrong, lying to Tom was wrong. Everything I always did was wrong.
“He- he- he” I stutter a few times trying to grasp a hold of what to say. “He cheat- Tom slept with someone else!” The words fly out of my mouth angrily. I still can’t believe they’re true.
“He cheated on you?” Jack asks, his tone turning serious and his eyes turning cold.I don’t answer, but instead try to swallow the lump forming in throat. “I’m going to kill him.”
“Please stop!” I grab Jack by the wrist as he gets up off the bed. Flashbacks of the day Chris found out why Tom and I broke up filling my head, the day that the two of them started physically fighting following shortly after. “He didn’t cheat on me.”
“But you just said-”
“I said he slept with someone else... We weren’t together when it happened...” Every time the words fall from my mouth I feel my heart crumbling more and more.
“I’m so sorry” Jack sits back down. He wraps his arm around my shoulder, running it up and down my arm.
“Don’t be; I shouldn’t be upset, I shouldn’t be mad” My bottom lips begins to quiver, threatening to fail me as I try to speak. “We weren’t together. We weren’t together.” I repeat as if trying to convince myself that it was all okay.
“But it is bothering you.”
I sit in silence trying to not give in and agree. I don’t want it to bother me, I don’t want to ruin everything between Tom and I.
“He didn’t even tell me” I barely break the silence with a whisper.
“What?” Jack questions.
“He didn’t even tell me. He didn’t fucking tell me Jack: Tonia let it slip when we were out to lunch today, she thought I knew!” I begin my rant. You think he would tell me, right? I mean that would be the right thing to do after everything, but no of course not!” I was fuming
“Laci-Rae I”
“He completely bullshitted me this entire time: oh Lace I never stopped loving you. I missed you the entire time. I was trying to figure out how to get you back. Yeah he must of missed me so much while he was screwing Sophie. Oh yeah did I mention it was Sophie Lee. It just had to be Sophie”
“Laci-Rae,” Jack’s hand moves to my lower back. I instantly crumple into his lap on the verge of hyperventilating.
“Breathe, just breathe” He begins tracing small circles on my back.
“Why did he have to sleep with her?” I hiccup as I try to catch my breath. “Why wasn’t I good enough for him?”
Jack continues to trace circles and other shapes on my back as I stay laying in his lap. He keeps answering my pointless questions that we both know he doesn’t have answers for, but his words comfort me and eventually lull me to sleep.
The rest of the night wasn’t so peaceful though as I am constantly plagues and bombarded with nightmares of the night of Tonia’s party and Tom and Sophie together, causing me to wake up alone and crying. It was just like the week of A-day all over again, but worse.
